Captain's Crew

[Holymunchkin]

With the return of our glorious leader, I have taken it upon myself to write down the nature of our crew.

In regards to recruitment...

We are excited to begin recruiting people again on the conditions that they lack,
a. humor/intelligence,
b. the ability to kill two mobs in EE or HE.

We are generally looking for people without epic destinies. If you don't fill those requirements you may want to apply to Ravensguard, Omnipresence, or some other dribble.

In regards to raiding...

"We have designated Thursday night at 7pm EST as guild run time. The crew has set this time aside for max participation. We often run the newest raid on these nights. We do not have a raid or log off policy. Having 2 toons is encouraged but not mandatory."

You may also find us doing LE on Sundays.

In regards to halflings... and their gnome knockoffs...

Bacon wrapped, preferably.

Other dribble...

Drama is not tolerated. You will be a minion. You may pretend to have nipples. Officers are elected formally and informally. We are a "Patonian" democracy (see addendum for nothing). When the overlord dies or is incapacitated by his wife we will usurp him.

"Recruitment is democratic. It takes 5 votes to recruit a new member. Votes can count against. Applicants should have a history of running with us and want to run endgame in some capacity. Having a mic and not being a sociopath are highly encouraged although we have been known to make exceptions. Real life friends and family are given a de facto "shoe-in" and are highly encouraged to apply."

[-Avalon-]

With the return of our glorious leader, I have taken it upon myself to write down the nature of our crew.

In regards to recruitment...

We are excited to begin recruiting people again on the conditions that they lack,
a. humor/intelligence,
b. the ability to kill two mobs in EE or HE.

Indeed. I have never been able to kill only 2 enemies in any level of content. Often it is only 1, though.

We are generally looking for people without epic destinies. If you don't fill those requirements you may want to apply to Ravensguard, Omnipresence, or some other dribble.

I am fairly certain that my destiny is to be a "Washer of Dishes at a Mexican Restaurant", so we're good there!

In regards to raiding...

"We have designated Thursday night at 7pm EST as guild run time. The crew has set this time aside for max participation. We often run the newest raid on these nights. We do not have a raid or log off policy. Having 2 toons is encouraged but not mandatory."

You may also find us doing LE on Sundays.

Umm, ok. Raiding in this game is a very curious thing, determined highly by coincidental lining up of levels during mad TR-fests.

In regards to halflings... and their gnome knockoffs...

Bacon wrapped, preferably.

I'm not sure there is a better kind...

Other dribble...

Drama is not tolerated. You will be a minion. You may pretend to have nipples. Officers are elected formally and informally. We are a "Patonian" democracy (see addendum for nothing). When the overlord dies or is incapacitated by his wife we will usurp him.

The King is Dead! Long live the new king! (until he, as well, is dead by mysterious reasons...)

"Recruitment is democratic. It takes 5 votes to recruit a new member. Votes can count against. Applicants should have a history of running with us and want to run endgame in some capacity. Having a mic and not being a sociopath are highly encouraged although we have been known to make exceptions. Real life friends and family are given a de facto "shoe-in" and are highly encouraged to apply."

Well, then I should be a shoo in, I'm certain I could swing 5 votes against me!

Addendum: I already have TS3 with your server info and talk to you guys here and there, and promise to have unswerving faith and loyalty to your guild.

2nd Addendum: That is, until a higher level one comes along.

3rd Addendum: Or one less demanding, or has funnier guild members, or has members that erect statues to me.

4th Addendum: And if a guild shows up that starts with A, B, C... or pretty much any letter, actually.

Let's face it, I'm not exactly what one would call, "Loyal" more "Mercenary" or "Fickle", but I've had more colorful nicknames as well. It's all about the ship for me, and long walks on beaches while slaughtering and maiming indigenous folk.

[Eth]

We are generally looking for people without epic destinies. If you don't fill those requirements you may want to apply to Ravensguard, Omnipresence, or some other dribble.

Hold on there.
Actually, we changed our recruitment policy and have a new entry test now.

We have 5 device workstations in our cargo hold. If you can jump from one station to another, touching all 5 of them, without hitting the floor, you're in.

[-Avalon-]

Hold on there.
Actually, we changed our recruitment policy and have a new entry test now.

We have 5 device workstations in our cargo hold. If you can jump from one station to another, touching all 5 of them, without hitting the floor, you're in.

I try to stay in wraith form, no danger of me hitting floor :-)

[lifestaker]

We are generally looking for people without epic destinies. If you don't fill those requirements you may want to apply to Ravensguard, Omnipresence, or some other dribble.

I will have you know that we have 2 people without epic destinies, they are great comic relief in raids. Outside that it is great to know you all are recruiting again. I will make sure to turn off my accept guild invites on my bot accounts while on korthos.

Hold on there.
Actually, we changed our recruitment policy and have a new entry test now.

We have 5 device workstations in our cargo hold. If you can jump from one station to another, touching all 5 of them, without hitting the floor, you're in.

Will have to keep this secret from my son, if he learns that there are parkour tests in DDO then he might want to do them endlessly like he does on his minecraft servers.

[Holymunchkin]

You guys should all apply!
Eth you only have one destiny though right?
Vic we don't let zergers in so you're out.

[lifestaker]

Vic we don't let zergers in so you're out.

That is okay, i gave up on smelling the flowers a ways ago and have no desire to slow down because my play does not fit well into the YouTube video that someone watched. Zerging or speed running is much more fun to some of us then being told how to play, what spells we can use, and what our role is. But, if I do find myself requiring a person to get me ransack in the quest I will give yous a shout out.

[Sirea]

Vic we don't let zergers in so you're out.

Great, now you've gone and done it. Now I have to listen to him cry all night.

[Hobgoblin]

Great, now you've gone and done it. Now I have to listen to him cry all night.

no. you dont.

duct tape.

ear plugs.

problem solved!

[Holymunchkin]

That is okay, i gave up on smelling the flowers a ways ago and have no desire to slow down because my play does not fit well into the YouTube video that someone watched. Zerging or speed running is much more fun to some of us then being told how to play, what spells we can use, and what our role is. But, if I do find myself requiring a person to get me ransack in the quest I will give yous a shout out.

ty

how do you guys feel about being our recruitment guild? you guys are lvl 200 so that does indicate you are nubs

[Holymunchkin]

Great, now you've gone and done it. Now I have to listen to him cry all night.

Wait I'm confused. Your bio says flower sniffer!?!!?

[lifestaker]

Wait I'm confused. Your bio says flower sniffer!?!!?

I think it says flour sniffer to be honest.

[MonadRebelion]

For those of you who have not yet heard, this is a pyramid scheme. Do not join. Also, no one in this guild is related to this deposed king of Nigeria. Don't click any links they send you. Don't open any of their emails.

[Tahkhesis]

For those of you who have not yet heard, this is a pyramid scheme. Do not join. Also, no one in this guild is related to this deposed king of Nigeria. Don't click any links they send you. Don't open any of their emails.

And no matter how much they cry, or how much they beg...never...NEVER feed them after midnight.

I'll show myself out.

[-Avalon-]

For those of you who have not yet heard, this is a pyramid scheme. Do not join. Also, no one in this guild is related to this deposed king of Nigeria. Don't click any links they send you. Don't open any of their emails.

But, but... They said they found an account that had been abandoned with my name on it, and that if I give them my info, they'd transfer the million shards (minus filing fees and such) to me!!

[Eth]

You guys should all apply!
Eth you only have one destiny though right?

Yes, at least one, so I guess I'm out then.

I also don't share CC's belief that trolls are not mammals, so I don't think I would fit well anyway.

[kaleid0star]

I'm back mooks! I can't log in at the moment cause turbine is being turbine but see you in game hopefully this weekend

[Basura_Grande]

I also don't share CC's belief that trolls are not mammals, so I don't think I would fit well anyway.

Blasphemy.

[Taps]

bump