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[Bekki]

I need to vent...


So what do I tell my Mom? When do I call her? I can hope Lady comes back on her own but chances are... she's a sweet, pretty, friendly dog... chances are someone picked her up. She has a collar but I don't know if Mom got her tags and I didn't look. The only thing I can think I could have done differently was sleep in the living room until Lady went home so I would have been awake every time Dad woke. *sigh*

The weirdest bit? Hubby said his family had only ever had outside dogs and his Dad had never taken an interest in them, not even enough to walk them. So why is he letting the dog out of the backyard?

Oh my!

Hope things work out.

But oh need to come clean soon.
This is a tough one.
I know you don’t want to ruin her trip but she needs to know.
Better sooner rather than later.
I hope the puppy comes back.
But I think even if she does, let mom know he was an issue and due to you dads illness
It’s not safe for you to watch her in the future.

Praying for the puppies safe return.

[cdbd3rd]

.... no sign of Lady.

So what do I tell my Mom? When do I call her? I can hope Lady comes back on her own but chances are... she's a sweet, pretty, friendly dog... chances are someone picked her up. She has a collar but I don't know if Mom got her tags and I didn't look. The only thing I can think I could have done differently was sleep in the living room until Lady went home so I would have been awake every time Dad woke. *sigh*

The weirdest bit? Hubby said his family had only ever had outside dogs and his Dad had never taken an interest in them, not even enough to walk them. So why is he letting the dog out of the backyard?

Oooohh.... boooyyyy....

Being an outsider without the guilt thing going on, my first line of defense would be reminding her you'd said "No" for a reason. I don't recommend actually using that defense yourself.

As for the 'when', don't throw yourself on your sword til you have to. Calling her early will just ruin what's left of her away time, possibly even in her mind giving her more reason to be angry when she gets back. Until then, cover the basics of lost animal hunting - posters, checking with shelters, etc. Dog chipped? [[edit: As Bek and I are at opposite ends on the 'when' question, I guess we weren't much help on that one. ]]


FiL's interest in the dog... with dementia, the earlier memories usually stay intact the longest, so did he perhaps have a dog when he was a kid?

Adding another virtual *hug*, and wishes for pup's safe & timely return.

[doomboyv2]

Oooohh.... boooyyyy....

Being an outsider without the guilt thing going on, my first line of defense would be reminding her you'd said "No" for a reason. I don't recommend actually using that defense yourself.

As for the 'when', don't throw yourself on your sword til you have to. Calling her early will just ruin what's left of her away time, possibly even in her mind giving her more reason to be angry when she gets back. Until then, cover the basics of lost animal hunting - posters, checking with shelters, etc. Dog chipped? [[edit: As Bek and I are at opposite ends on the 'when' question, I guess we weren't much help on that one. ]]


FiL's interest in the dog... with dementia, the earlier memories usually stay intact the longest, so did he perhaps have a dog when he was a kid?

Adding another virtual *hug*, and wishes for pup's safe & timely return.

Dang. Personally, I agree with CD's call of waiting till she's back. unless there's some way she can help.

Maybe leave out a bowl of her favorite food? If you have an old smartphone lying around, you have apps which let you use them as motion tracker cameras which can set off an alarm. Could set that up at the bowl, so that if she comes and start eating, the alarm will go off and you can go grab her. How old is Lady? that may also affect her traveling habits.

[doomboyv2]

That's wonderful news! You should be proud of your accomplishment. Hope you get to go and this COVID-19 stuff doesn't get in the way.

Very cool!

Happy Flag Day, all.

(Is this a mirror /nab?)

Congratulations on your acceptance, Doppleganger.

Thanks guys. Just trying to get a scholarship or something sorted. Approached our Rotary, but seems a lot of funds are put on hold due to COVID.
Worst comes to, my sister can support me, but i'd rather get aid to fund it.

[Aelonwy]

Just checking in before I crash for the night. We joined the Lost and Found Pets App this morning, in particular the group for our area. Drove around the neighborhood again. My Mom called this afternoon and there was no way I could lie to her. Mom was upset but she didn't blame me as much as I expected. So Lady has a chip but I have to make calls to her original vet where she was chipped and my Mom doesn't know who that was because Lady was originally my sister's dog. My sister hasn't called me back yet. We don't talk much. But Mom did send me a picture of Lady I can put on the Lost and Found Pets App, and/or print out for a neighborhood flyer.

Lady is an older dog, not elderly but just beginning to gray at the muzzle and not as active as she used to be. I'm surprised she would go far voluntarily.

I have left a bowl of food out, so far its only attracted ants. There is no "local" animal shelter but I have called the closest ones.

P.S. No idea if hubby's Dad had a dog as a young kid or teen. Hubby doesn't remember any such stories and his Dad just rambles when I try to ask him questions. I mean some things he remembers and can express clearly but if he's confused or foggy he gets frustrated even being questioned about it. I think its strange that now that the dog is missing... even though the empty dog house is still in the yard (from the garage) and there's still bowls outside the back door and dog toys strewn across the yard... he's no longer asking about the dog or staring in the backyard or... trying the backdoor or going out to the gate. He's acting more normal again instead of bothered and fidgety. Its as though Lady's presence in the backyard was bothering him in some intangible way but the paraphernalia of a dog doesn't bother him in any way. ?

But thanks everyone for your advice and kind words.

[cdbd3rd]

.... Its as though Lady's presence in the backyard was bothering him in some intangible way but the paraphernalia of a dog doesn't bother him in any way. ?

But thanks everyone for your advice and kind words.

Still sending positive vibes for a safe return home.

As for dad, ... there was obviously a trigger of some sort there, but the cause/effect of that goes way beyond the Psych 101 I took.... dang, almost 30 years ago.

[Aelonwy]

Still sending positive vibes for a safe return home.

As for dad, ... there was obviously a trigger of some sort there, but the cause/effect of that goes way beyond the Psych 101 I took.... dang, almost 30 years ago.

Thank you.

I think so now too but I can't begin to work out what's going on in his mind. As far as I can tell he likes dogs okay. He'll pat friends and family's pets if they bring them when they visit. But something about seeing a dog in the backyard bugs him?! Maybe? Maybe its just that he doesn't recognize the dog? Or know/remember where it came from?

AFAIR he was like this when my Mom stayed with us too but -I thought- he was upset because he kept forgetting who she was and not knowing why this woman (stranger to him) was in his house, it don't recall that it had much to do with her dog. Of course when she was staying with us the dog was in the house too much of the time anyway (aggravating hubby).

Now I feel confused. I don't know how to separate cause from conjecture, correlation from hindsight? too little concrete information and no way to know anything for certain because questioning him is futile. *sigh*

Still no sign of Lady. I hope she's okay.

[Tscheuss]

*looks at you suspiciously...

Hmmmm.... I’m not sure if I’m buying...
but appreciate the /nabby all the same.

The it was explained to me many moons ago the front and back would be the same (Eg. 5115)
But I’m not a numbers guys so it made sense to me at the time.

Not an ambigram, but still a mirror. Hold up 51 to a mirror, and you will see 12.

[Tscheuss]

Thank you.

I think so now too but I can't begin to work out what's going on in his mind. As far as I can tell he likes dogs okay. He'll pat friends and family's pets if they bring them when they visit. But something about seeing a dog in the backyard bugs him?! Maybe? Maybe its just that he doesn't recognize the dog? Or know/remember where it came from?

AFAIR he was like this when my Mom stayed with us too but -I thought- he was upset because he kept forgetting who she was and not knowing why this woman (stranger to him) was in his house, it don't recall that it had much to do with her dog. Of course when she was staying with us the dog was in the house too much of the time anyway (aggravating hubby).

Now I feel confused. I don't know how to separate cause from conjecture, correlation from hindsight? too little concrete information and no way to know anything for certain because questioning him is futile. *sigh*

Still no sign of Lady. I hope she's okay.

Have you checked around your mom's house? Dogs have been known to go back to familiar places.

[cdbd3rd]

Have you checked around your mom's house? Dogs have been known to go back to familiar places.

I was thinking that earlier myself. Certainly depends on distance.

[Bekki]

Have you checked around your mom's house? Dogs have been known to go back to familiar places.

I was thinking the same thing Tscheuss. Was thinking maybe she went back there to look for her mom.

[Aelonwy]

Have you checked around your mom's house? Dogs have been known to go back to familiar places.

I was thinking that earlier myself. Certainly depends on distance.

I was thinking the same thing Tscheuss. Was thinking maybe she went back there to look for her mom.

For the past ~2 years, since my grandmother died, my mom has been living with her best friend much further away then before. I had to Google it but she now lives 56.2 miles away address to address as a car would travel; I am uncertain about distance as-the-crow-flies. It used to take a half hour to get to her home from ours now it takes almost 2 hours with traffic. Certainly it isn't impossible for a dog to travel that distance but I find it difficult to imagine Lady going that far when she has to take a nap after playing with the kids for any length of time. She was never a super athletic dog, more of the lazy, plop-and-rub-my-belly variety.

[Bekki]

For the past ~2 years, since my grandmother died, my mom has been living with her best friend much further away then before. I had to Google it but she now lives 56.2 miles away address to address as a car would travel; I am uncertain about distance as-the-crow-flies. It used to take a half hour to get to her home from ours now it takes almost 2 hours with traffic. Certainly it isn't impossible for a dog to travel that distance but I find it difficult to imagine Lady going that far when she has to take a nap after playing with the kids for any length of time. She was never a super athletic dog, more of the lazy, plop-and-rub-my-belly variety.

Fair point.
However, There are many stories of when a dog thinks they lost a loved one, and they have travelled hundreds, (If not Thousands)of miles to find them.
Even if they were not the most athletic dog.
Love is a crazy powerful thing.

[Aelonwy]

Fair point.
However, There are many stories of when a dog thinks they lost a loved one, and they have travelled hundreds, (If not Thousands)of miles to find them.
Even if they were not the most athletic dog.
Love is a crazy powerful thing.

I'll see if I can get a neighbor's phone number and ask if they've seen her. I still think its unlikely but it can't hurt to ask. Lady was originally my sister's dog, I wonder if she would have traveled back to the first house she lived in... I'm not keen to call or go drive over there, my sister's ex is a crazy meth head.

[cdbd3rd]

RIP, Bilbo.

Ian Holm, 88.

[Phoenicis]

*raises a glass

[cdbd3rd]

Was looking out back and saw a young doe up in the back yard. She pranced around a little but hopped back into the brush line before anyone got to me with a camera. But moments later, Bambi came prancing along mama's trail, but got sidetracked by our bird feeder.







That made it a nice day.

[cdbd3rd]

Ael... Trying to think positive thoughts and hope that no news is good news.

[Aelonwy]

Ael... Trying to think positive thoughts and hope that no news is good news.

Love the pics of the fawn. Well, I haven't given up but so far we've heard nothing. Got a hold of a neighbor of my Mom's; they hadn't seen her. Got a hold of my sister, wish I hadn't, turns out my Mom was wrong about my sister having Lady chipped. I can't say I'm surprised, my sister didn't have Lady fixed, my Mom did, my sister didn't keep up with Lady's shots, my Mom does... I have no idea why Mom thought my sis would be so forward thinking and responsible as to have Lady chipped.

But now my sister is acting like her firstborn child got kidnapped and its ALL my fault, I should be calling every vet and every shelter between here and Mom's, and why am I not making hundreds of flyers and posting them everywhere and knocking on everyone's door, and I should be leaving flyers in mail boxes (which is illegal but she's mad we won't do it anyway) and why aren't we offering a reward? She says she'll offer a reward and she also said if she'd known Mom needed someone to care for the dog she would have paid for it to be kenneled till Mom got back which is insanely laughable because she hasn't paid for any of Lady's needs or vet bills or anything since she dumped her on Mom. Which by the way, she wanted to dump her on us first because we have a big yard and hubby said NO and she was POed at us for that for a time. I hate this guilt-trippy drama BS.

Sorry to vent again. I don't want to vent at hubby, he's tried to help as much as he can. My sister griped at him too and his response was to block her from calling his phone.

[cdbd3rd]

....Sorry to vent again. I don't want to vent at hubby, he's tried to help as much as he can.

That has always been what we do best here. We may not be able to fix most things, but we're always here to listen.

...My sister griped at him too and his response was to block her from calling his phone.

Amazing how many things can be fixed with a simple 'Rt-Click + Ignore'. It works on sisters, too, tho might have a little more fallout than the hub doing it.

On the other hand, if she's stressing ya out without being of any real help, maybe a day or two on time out is just what the bartender ordered.