To the Niggardly Apostles.

[NaturalHazard]

Dude, No offence, but I don't even think Cannith Rocket Boots would help me follow that jump in logic.

You said a immature type grab for attention. Someone dating someone of a different ethnic group solely to get a reaction is similar, outrage is what they are after. I have seen both cases, not that there is anything wrong with dating someone from a different ethnic background, but knowing that the parents or whoever the person is trying to outrage has prejudices against it, then doing it just to rile them up while having little real interest in the person they are dating but more in the reactions they can get.


Its one of those classic ways to get back at or show up daddy, in many cases someone from a different class or a poorer background would do, but one of the best is race because its one of the worst prejudices to have and if you can use it, can have maximum effect.

[Ungood]

You said a immature type grab for attention. Someone dating someone of a different ethnic group solely to get a reaction is similar, outrage is what they are after.I have seen both cases, not that there is anything wrong with dating someone from a different ethnic background, but knowing that the parents or whoever the person is trying to outrage has prejudices against it, then doing it just to rile them up while having little real interest in the person they are dating but more in the reactions they can get.

I see what you mean, and yah that is a jerk move, I mean you're right, you're not only playing your parents/peers, you're also playing the other person in the relationship, and that is just not cool.

[NaturalHazard]

I see what you mean, and yah that is a jerk move, I mean you're right, you're not only playing your parents/peers, you're also playing the other person in the relationship, and that is just not cool.

Yep iv'e had suspicions iv'e been in a similar situation a few times and back then I was outraged lol, I was also very vain and idealistic, now not so much, iv'e become jaded and a bit cynical I would now in a similar situation just get what i can out of it then move on, sad to say.

[Ungood]

Yep iv'e had suspicions iv'e been in a similar situation a few times and back then I was outraged lol, I was also very vain and idealistic, now not so much, iv'e become jaded and a bit cynical I would now in a similar situation just get what i can out of it then move on, sad to say.

I would not blame you either. I think the person should be upfront about it. No one should be playing other people like that.

[NaturalHazard]

I think this might be really hard for some people to understand my stance I will make an attempt to try and explain it. I think making those unrelated words bad words to use, and unacceptable is a victory for the racists and the people just using it to gain attention. They have gotten what they want, drawn attention to the issue in a negative way and gotten the rest of us to respond in a negative way, symbolically showing their power over us to insult and hurt us to such an extent that we all react to ban unrelated words. So we lose the use of some more vocabulary and they have gained another thing they know they can use to niggle people. Or is niggle going to be another one of those words to go on the list? That is a very popular word used in this part of the world, especially around sports here.

The best reaction to someone trying to get a rise out of people by using that word in its correct context but secretly trying to get a reaction is to......ignore it. Reply and use the word in its correct context, it would be even more deflating for those kinds of people to see african americans or other people who are suppose to be the ones that type of racial slur is aimed at, correctly using niggardly and other words like it without batting an eyelid. Your filthy word has no power over us, we can use words that sound like it and it does not bother us. If any word should fall out of use the racial slur itself should not the other unrelated ones. Banning and taking action like this against other words just empowers the slur more, shows how much weight it has and keeps it alive longer.

[Ungood]

I think this might be really hard for some people to understand my stance I will make an attempt to try and explain it. I think making those unrelated words bad words to use, and unacceptable is a victory for the racists and the people just using it to gain attention. They have gotten what they want, drawn attention to the issue in a negative way and gotten the rest of us to respond in a negative way, symbolically showing their power over us to insult and hurt us to such an extent that we all react to ban unrelated words. So we lose the use of some more vocabulary and they have gained another thing they know they can use to niggle people. Or is niggle going to be another one of those words to go on the list? That is a very popular word used in this part of the world, especially around sports here.

The best reaction to someone trying to get a rise out of people by using that word in its correct context but secretly trying to get a reaction is to......ignore it. Reply and use the word in its correct context, it would be even more deflating for those kinds of people to see african americans or other people who are suppose to be the ones that type of racial slur is aimed at, correctly using niggardly and other words like it without batting an eyelid. Your filthy word has no power over us, we can use words that sound like it and it does not bother us. If any word should fall out of use the racial slur itself should not the other unrelated ones. Banning and taking action like this against other words just empowers the slur more, shows how much weight it has and keeps it alive longer.

I understand what you are saying. And I agree with you, I believe that the only words that will offend you are the words you let offend you. That is the power a person gives to a word, and power they let someone else have over them with that word.

But I was not discussing if the word itself was bad, I was discussing the intent behind why it was used.

Yes, you are correct, the right thing to do is ignore the word and thus remove all it's power and influence, move on, and just let it go, thus depriving them of their much sought off attention, but, in doing that, you have to believe that they used the word to get a rise out of you to begin with.

And that is what I was saying.

[BOgre]

I think this might be really hard for some people to understand my stance I will make an attempt to try and explain it. I think making those unrelated words bad words to use, and unacceptable is a victory for the racists and the people just using it to gain attention. They have gotten what they want, drawn attention to the issue in a negative way and gotten the rest of us to respond in a negative way, symbolically showing their power over us to insult and hurt us to such an extent that we all react to ban unrelated words. So we lose the use of some more vocabulary and they have gained another thing they know they can use to niggle people. Or is niggle going to be another one of those words to go on the list? That is a very popular word used in this part of the world, especially around sports here.

The best reaction to someone trying to get a rise out of people by using that word in its correct context but secretly trying to get a reaction is to......ignore it. Reply and use the word in its correct context, it would be even more deflating for those kinds of people to see african americans or other people who are suppose to be the ones that type of racial slur is aimed at, correctly using niggardly and other words like it without batting an eyelid. Your filthy word has no power over us, we can use words that sound like it and it does not bother us. If any word should fall out of use the racial slur itself should not the other unrelated ones. Banning and taking action like this against other words just empowers the slur more, shows how much weight it has and keeps it alive longer.

100% right.

[NaturalHazard]

I understand what you are saying. And I agree with you, I believe that the only words that will offend you are the words you let offend you. That is the power a person gives to a word, and power they let someone else have over them with that word.

But I was not discussing if the word itself was bad, I was discussing the intent behind why it was used.

Yes, you are correct, the right thing to do is ignore the word and thus remove all it's power and influence, move on, and just let it go, thus depriving them of their much sought off attention, but, in doing that, you have to believe that they used the word to get a rise out of you to begin with.

And that is what I was saying.

Ok, well I think in this case we cannot be 100% certain that the poster really had that intent from the start. If they where lets not give them the satisfaction by reacting the way they would want if that was the case.

[HungarianRhapsody]

I gotta be honest, and to tell the truth, the first topic reeked of being total troll bait, the second one was near downright Juvenal trying to justify their first little stint and an unwillingness to let it go or take accountability for their own actions trying to call everyone else ignorant.

As I see it, you were not offended by the first two, this one should be waters off a ducks back, so step and answer the question or move on with your life.

The OP asks some good questions about our maturity levels and what would be proper social etiquette here, and well, Would you?

So the other threads were "troll bait", but the OP here asks some good questions?

Wow.

[joshuafields]

I think I will exit now.

[Ungood]

So the other threads were "troll bait", but the OP here asks some good questions?

Regardless if I think the source of this discussion and the other topics like it are little more then troll bait and Juvenal BS, The questions themselves are inherently thought provoking questions in regards to our social etiquette of life vs Internets.

[Ungood]

Ok, well I think in this case we cannot be 100% certain that the poster really had that intent from the start. If they where lets not give them the satisfaction by reacting the way they would want if that was the case.

True, but this brings us to the final end, the whole point of using the word to start with was to incite, from that single use, 3 maybe more topics have been started and discussed, twas a wonderful troll.

I enjoyed have taken part it.. well that and my internet was so bad I could not play tonight, so I had to entertain myself.

[Tscheuss]

I think this might be really hard for some people to understand my stance I will make an attempt to try and explain it. I think making those unrelated words bad words to use, and unacceptable is a victory for the racists and the people just using it to gain attention. They have gotten what they want, drawn attention to the issue in a negative way and gotten the rest of us to respond in a negative way, symbolically showing their power over us to insult and hurt us to such an extent that we all react to ban unrelated words. So we lose the use of some more vocabulary and they have gained another thing they know they can use to niggle people. Or is niggle going to be another one of those words to go on the list? That is a very popular word used in this part of the world, especially around sports here.

The best reaction to someone trying to get a rise out of people by using that word in its correct context but secretly trying to get a reaction is to......ignore it. Reply and use the word in its correct context, it would be even more deflating for those kinds of people to see african americans or other people who are suppose to be the ones that type of racial slur is aimed at, correctly using niggardly and other words like it without batting an eyelid. Your filthy word has no power over us, we can use words that sound like it and it does not bother us. If any word should fall out of use the racial slur itself should not the other unrelated ones. Banning and taking action like this against other words just empowers the slur more, shows how much weight it has and keeps it alive longer.

If someone is using a word you dislike in the correct context, the best reaction is to ignore it regardless of why she used that particular word. If the intent was to provoke drama, ignoring her usage deprives her of her goal. If there was no intent to cause drama, then one does not dishonor oneself by making false accusations.

[Full_Bleed]

I think this might be really hard for some people to understand my stance I will make an attempt to try and explain it. I think making those unrelated words bad words to use, and unacceptable is a victory for the racists and the people just using it to gain attention. They have gotten what they want, drawn attention to the issue in a negative way and gotten the rest of us to respond in a negative way, symbolically showing their power over us to insult and hurt us to such an extent that we all react to ban unrelated words.

This is not hard to understand at all.

The back-n-forth with Ungood you have engaged in has brought up very good points.

Words do, in fact, only have as much power as the person hearing them gives them. Knowing that is an important part of choosing the words we use wisely and acknowledging who our potential audience may be. We don't just speak to hear ourselves speak (most of use, at least). We speak to communicate something to our audience.

Just because I am not offended by a word and I want to make it powerless by "using it correctly" does not automatically make it so for everyone. So I have a choice: Decide for my audience what they are allowed to be offended by (which make me pretty egotistical and assures a failure to communicate), or take care to choose more effective words.

Most of us have social filters that make this pretty effortless. And when we do misstep, most of us are also quick acknowledge it, and take corrective action (that is, if we care at all about what the consequence of our misstep is... i.e. offending someone we did not wish to.)

Where some of us are diverging is that when choosing not to use a particular word, phrase, or inference to avoid offense I don't feel subjugated, diminished, or controlled in any manner. I have an extensive vocabulary and have lots of choices. My sole purpose in saying anything at all it to communicate effectively. I can still choose to use whatever word I wish. Like I chose to use the word in this thread. The word does not intimidate me. I've not allowed anyone to redefined it. I'm simply acknowledging that it has power beyond its dictionary definition. I'm exercising a basic understanding of what the word might evoke or mean to others as well as what it means to me.

I believe that doing so should be at the core of any respectful discourse.

[katz]

this whole 'niggardly' discussion is just tiresome and i cannot honestly believe it's gone to THREE different threads now. honestly people.

there's alot of ignorance, indignation, and self importance floating around, on BOTH sides of the argument.

it's a word. there is nothing wrong with that word... it's a word with very old roots that have nothing to do with the other word it sounds like it contains. it could be argued that someone who doesn't know the definition and reacts negatively to a perceived slight is ignorant, and they are... but in turn, it can also be argued that the person who used the word is ignorant of the similarity between the sound of the word they used, and a word with an extreme negative connotation, and this is also true. in an ideal world, the first person would say "oh, i'm sorry. i thought that word was related to that other word. my bad." and the second person would say "dang, i'm also sorry, i didn't think it would offend anyone. offense was not my intention." and they'd shake hands and move on. but instead people puff up their chests and butt into each other and say "how could you not know!" back and forth to each other.

when i saw the title of the FIRST thread...i already knew what the word meant, so i knew exactly what the OP was saying, but a little voice in the back of my head also said "that LOOKS like a bad word, someone will probably react poorly. i would not have used that word." and sure enough, here we are, 2 threads later, still hashing out every tiny detail.

on one hand, it's a shame that a word with such a long history back into old Norse etc etc falls into disuse because of negative association... even a false association... however, it's also the natural evolution of language for words to fall into disuse or change definition over time. with that said, perhaps it is time to give "Niggardly" a rest. please.