I'm just gonna jump right in with this, then ask my question at the end for those with the fortitude to listen to my whining for a few paragraphs:

So, yesterday, I was in a group farming a quest. We get an arti after one of the other people drop, he comes in at the tail end of the quest, gets free xp. The LFM said "Zerg, speed runs, know it, IP". He asks for a share. We inform him it's a quest you have to flag for, so no way to share. We run the quest, and he says wait while he turns it in. ?!! Then, a few seconds later, he asks why he can't turn it in. I explain, as patiently as I can, that he's ONLY going to get XP out of the quest, that we are running it a few times, and that if he wants the full quest he needs to flag for it. We go back in, decide to split up, he is put in my group. He runs off with another group, then runs off from THEM, off the beaten path, picks up an important quest item, and dies. We all have just drank potions (I shelled out real dollars for a potion on the DDO store, so I was doubly annoyed), anticipating quick runs (since otherwise why put up the LFM?), and this guy more than doubles the run time as we have to go find him. Awesome.

We recall, half the group takes off in annoyance, leaving me, him and a cleric, we go back in and he asks why we aren't doing other quests. Then he says he's new and doesn't know what he's doing. I'd had it. Paraphrasing:

"Look, it's obvious you have no idea what you're doing. While most of the time this is OK, when you join an elite <QUEST>, a few things are assumed: 1, that you know what you are doing, 2, that if you DON'T know what you're doing, that you are willing to listen, 3, that even if you cannot handle 1 or 2 that you will not hinder us while we grind out XP. You have failed in all 3. In the future, there is nothing wrong with learning how to do a quest on normal or hard before you go to elite. This quest is boring. We are all (with the exception of you) either TRs or multi character owners and just want to get through this as quickly as possible. When you come in, get the <ITEMS> we need, get lost because you refuse to follow directions, and then die, people no longer want to run with you. In the future, please at least let us KNOW you are new, so we can adjust or let you know if this quest isn't for you"

Yes, it was a little rude, and I didn't necessarily mean to be, but something wondrous happened: he learned something!
Through tells after we disbanded, he noted he had joined quite a few Elite/ know it PUGs, gone in, gotten screamed at and squelched, kicked from groups, and had no idea why. Then he said the reason he joined our group was because he HAD tried normal (doubtful, since you have to flag for it), and had died a bunch of times and couldn't figure it out (so, doing it on elite makes it easier because....?), and was going to stop playing the game (he had an arti, meaning he had plonked down some cash to play) because everyone was so mean... I guess point is (no I'm not looking for kudos), some of these guys are a little slower to pick up on things than we used to be, and I'm not sure about the reason why but it's a reality.

Another incident involved someone joining a WW zerg group I had joined (hey, what can I say, soloing gets dull) and complaining that we weren't going for all the optionals and collectables and what have you. 5 of us have done Waterworks numerous times. I have done it more than 200 times, since before all the bravery bonuses and what have you it was a good way to get up in levels (or get a levelling sigil). For the most part, I just want to get through a quest as quickly, efficiently, and cost effectively as possible. I join groups where my way of thinking is the majority, and it's always a little embarrassing when we have someone join who is obviously NOT of that mindset and demands we all change to their style of play in order to appease them. This is selfish and rude. If I join a group that says "flower sniffing, team-work, need RP players" etc, I join and do that (example: If I joined a Thunderholme group or a high road or anything from the last 3 updates, I would only join slow moving groups because I want to read the dialogue and explore); I don't try to run off, I don't whine when someone goes down a non-optimal path.

The same should be true of zerg groups. I don't always join zerg groups, but when I do, I demand they move with haste at all times. To join a group that's farmed a quest for the umpteenth time and demand they let me check every nook and cranny means I'M the tool.

The newb actually thanked me for the help without asking for any plat/ items/ guest passes, and went on about his way. I felt good, having maybe unleashed a decent player on the server...

I'm not looking for kudos, or for a pat on the back. I don't need one. All I'm asking is that rather than squelch immediately and move on, take just a second to see if you can point someone in the right direction. No, you can't help everyone, and you shouldn't have to. But if you squelch every noob that you run into, sooner or later you will have only 1 or 2 people to run with, and what's the fun in that?

As an aside, I had decided to go, as this is my third fighter life, 12 fighter/ 6 ranger/ 2 monk. I have been told that is a stupid build, and I need 6 levels of monk in order to be any good. Why? I thought all the fighter benefits would make it pretty good, with all the bonuses to ranged damage (I'm going AA)... what am I missing?


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