A lot of this information is already out there, just kind of scattered about.
Impaqt's old Evoker Build. It's still very much relevant for general build advice:
Evoker Favored Soul
Gear has been discussed here and there in bits and pieces:
Gear and tactics questions
FvS LF Gear Advice
I posted a quick build in a thread a while ago, it's pretty much Impaqt's but with epic feats.
That should answer some of your questions.
People will argue to the ends of the earth on this. It is
generally agreed that Evocation is better. This is because of Blade Barrier and Implosion, versus Slay Living and Destruction for Necromancy.
They're alright. They tend to be low damage but good for spamming. The Divine Wrath and Avenging Light abilities from Exalted Angel are amazing, but the rest tend to get worse as you level away from them (Searing Light, Holy Smite, Nimbus of Light). Divine Punishment is the exception, and is your go-to spell for boss nuking.
I don't remember where it is, but someone did a whole build around light spells. It's rather pointless to build that way, though, because you can use light spells just as easily as an Evoker.
Most people melee up to level 8 or so, when Favored Souls get Holy Smite. Evokers don't really come into their own as killing machines till 12 though, when Blade Barrier becomes an option. Some people will tell you to take Heal first; that's just nonsensical. Carry scrolls of Heal/Raise Dead as soon as you can though.
I don't have much info on this, but raid gear from Demon Queen in particular is good TR gear, as is most raid gear.
Opinions vary on this, and it depends on what you want to do at cap. I prefer to have enough strength to melee till the good spells kick in, and then I abandon melee entirely. Some people prefer to have melee all the way up to cap, but you end up sacrificing to get more DPS that way.