Why a indifference towards player with disability

[Nahual]

WOW pm me the name please! What a %@$#%#%!

I remember playing with a couple of people that had the same disability. They were actually brothers and really good players.

And even then this is responsability of the guy that has the star. Always ask if someone hasn't done the quest. If no response party line if not send tells and even then half the time you don't even need a plan just people paying attention to what the hell is going on. Which is not done by listening to people.

If you need a plan you can always write before engaging. This guy is again a ^&$%&^%&!

[furbyoats]

Sometimes I'll have an lfm up and will try to say something on voice...if the person doesn't respond I'll type to them if needed, and I have had a few people who were deaf in raids/parties. Typing important details doesn't take that long, it's really quite an easy workaround. I can assure you that I don't know of a single long term player that would do something like this. Some people that I run endgame stuff with can be short or snarky at times but never to an extent such as this.

PM me the name so I can make sure to avoid having to deal with this level of waste.

Not being able to hear requires a very slight tweak in order to communicate, far from the level of expelling someone from a group for a slight inconvenience.

[Buggss]

My wife is a teacher for the Deaf. I don't think any of you know the frustration involved with hearing impairment or complete loss of. Goodluck with your future grouping man.

In fact I do, being someone who actually does work with the hearing impaired and the deaf.

However because of that I also have to look for other issues, such as some other (possibly good) reason the group leader booted the OP.

These days you never know and mustn't assume anything.

[Kareena]

I agree with everything Gkar wrote. I require ears in my groups, but I make an exception for this guy from Fort Fotis because he has told me he is deaf. I do my best to type occasional instruction/responses when he is in group- though I forget at times. It does slightly slow me down- especially shadow crypt (I had my friend type instead while I lead)- but for the occasional quest it's okay. It's not like he can just go to walmart and buy some hearing you know? If he hadn't told me he was deaf, I would have booted him. LFM clearly states have ears most of the time- also zerg, byoheal etc. lol So anyway- yea I agree he should tell people he is deaf- not that he just doesn't have speakers. Most people are more willing to work with that if they know its not something you can "fix" imo.

You are completely wrong about that. While sex and race don't matter, language and hearing DEFINATELY matter. They impact your ability to communicate. That's something its fair for people to know because it limits your ability to join the party.

In the case of the disability, it actually makes an even bigger difference. If you just refuse to listen, I'll boot you. If you tell me you're deaf, I'll let you stay but warn you that I'll probably automatically comment in voice chat and may forget you can't hear so it may be a bit rough. If you are good with that, so am I. (Actually I'd do the same thing if you said "I'm on my laptop travelling and have no speakers")

Same with language really. If English is not your first language and you tell me I'll be much more understanding if it appears you aren't "getting" something or are having trouble with instructions and I'll repeat and rephrase. Otherwise, I'll just assume jerk and boot you. I've been the "english" guy in a non english group, I hold them back because I can't fully communicate with them and they, and fairly so, sometimes forget to toss out some english in the middle of an <insert language here> conversation.



No need to put that in the posting, its the default. Do you know how few people don't have ears turned on? Almost none. And they did a voice check, and booted the person who ignored them. (although I would have typed something as well first)



REQUIRE, no. But it makes it MUCH easier. I've played with a number of deaf people. Some of them were very good. But frankly it was always a slower and more difficult run. No one should be required to run with a disadvantage in their party if they don't want to. This is a GAME and it is for people to have FUN. I'll accomodate as much as I can, but not everyone has the patience for that, nor should they be required to.

edit: I'm responding in general - for harbor elites, you can run it with 1 player and 5 blind and deaf monkeys who don't even have a keyboard so really no excuse to kick there unless you are non responsive for quite a while or are in obvious pike mode.

[bartharok]

No matter what the reason he got kicked, the comment he got back was RUDE. And the gl doesnt make it any better. Its like shouting abuse at someone, and then saying gl when youre done and thinking it will wash clean your deeds.

[Truga]

OP, my guess is, the dude just thought "Oh, great, another dumb excuse!", as he had no way of knowing whether you were telling the truth or not, and you only bothered to mention that after getting kicked.

[Thrudh]

s this how a disabled person being treated been playing for 6 years who uses voice chat in crappy lowbie quests and never had difficulty in playing first time someone said

"find yourself a handicapped group gl"

Am asking why there is indifference towards players with disability

If in 6 years, this is the first time someone said that, why would you think there is "indifference towards players with disability"?

You met a jerk. Surely this isn't the first jerk you've ever met in your life right?

(Correct answer to that is: "Don't call me Shirley")

[Thrudh]

5. For someone primarily communcating via text, your writing sure is sloppy and devoid of punctuation.

Yeah, I thought that too...

[Cyiwin]

you say you've been playing for 6 years.... It doesnt sound like you run into this on a regular basis.... So why today have you decided this is some sort of epidemic? Some people are just jerks. Squelch em and move on.

I'm also curious about why you brought up one offending person and then ask the question "Why there is indifference towards players with disability"? If you came to the forums and stated x% of players who find out I'm deaf won't accept me into their group, that would have substance.

[Dharken]

I would say dont worry about it. Yes if you are handicapped in some way, please let at least the group leader know right off the bat what your handicap is so they know to work with you on it.

Personally if a person is a good player, they are a good player. I"ve had groups in other games where there have been language barriers, physical handicaps, etc and I would try to go out of my way to accomodate them. (I had a few brazillian players in my guild in another game that had very limited english so I used things like google translate and even learned a few simple portuguese words and sentences so i could translate what the group leader said to them either in text, or simple sentences).

Basically if someone shuns you off cause they don't want to deal with any disabilities you have, don't worry about. Just be up front with any problems you have and I'm sure you'll find the majority of people in this game will be, at the very least, willing to try to help you out.

Also you will find that some people just aren't willing to help you, and that's fine, it's their choice. This game is so plentiful of good, decent people that you will find a group you can play with and enjoy playing with, it may just take some time. Don't get discouraged by some "click,dismiss" happy person, cause honestley, they are probably not someone anyone wants to play with.

[SableShadow]

Surely this isn't the first jerk you've ever met in your life right?

It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

(Correct answer to that is: "Don't call me Shirley")

gdi! >.<

[zonedout_loser]

Play on sarlona for a week. Not only will you learn chinese and korean. But you'll understand the true meaning of aggrivation and nerd rage.

[Cauthey]

I am very sorry to hear about your encounter. The DDO community is often a shining one. However, every bunch has a bad apple or two, unfortunately.

I always prefer it when people can hear voice, but I almost never require it. It will irk me sometimes in challenging quests that require a lot of tight coordination, and quick decision making when some in the group cannot hear voice. Still... I can't think of a time when I would ever REQUIRE that hearing voice be a requirement for participating. Perhaps MAYBE in some upper level/epic raids. Even there...so long as the one without "ears" has an idea of whats going on and is willing to follow directions, not having "ears" is no big deal.

I truly hope that this was just a one-time bad experience with a "bad apple." All I can say is that I have had the distinct pleasure of grouping with all variety of people on Orien, and each one of them are a delight.

[stoerm]

I'm not sure if I'm more shocked at the rudeness of the player in question or the apologists in this thread. 'Polite GL', really? Would it be OK then to make a racial or religious slur, if it's combined with a 'good luck'? As in 'Get out of my group. Good luck, ******'?

The only thing I'd say is sadly bringing up any detail about yourself opens it up for ******s to hurt you. This applies doubly when there is any friction or conflict involved. I don't have a disability but there are things I've learned not to share about myself. People have a hard time with difference, unfortunately.

P.S. people manage to play DDO across language barriers, not having voice can be accommodated just as easily.

[Pfold]

Joined a group for harbor elites i was standing in near the quest area and went in quick started fighting quest was about to finish killed mobs healed party members and quest completed when came out of the dungeon i was just about to type that i am deaf handicapped guy i cannot use headset i was just about to type i got kicked out of the group i asked why he kicked me he said he asked something and i did not answered i told him i was about to type that am a deaf handicapped guy cannot use headset he said go find yourself a HANDICAPPED GROUP GL is this how a disabled person being treated been playing for 6 years who uses voice chat in crappy lowbie quests and never had difficulty in playing first time someone said

"find yourself a handicapped group gl"

Am asking why there is indifference towards players with disability

Hrm. There's a few things I'm having trouble with understanding this post.

You don't say whether or not you died or caused someone else to die in the quest. If it's a tr run this is pretty important to those running it. It would explain the rudeness of the other party. Disability or not, if someone is a terrible player people will not want to group with them.

You also do not mention whether or not you typed (communicated) anything in party chat prior to being kicked. Generally folks who do not type or say anything on voice chat are pretty much assumed to not understand the language (English by default) used in the lfm note.

Also for someone who has played for 6 years, you definitely have grouped with more people than I have. You should know better than I that if you feel you have a limitation as far as either contribution or communication is concerned it should be noted up front. I have run quests with folks who disclosed their limitations up front and 9 out of 10 times the rest of the party would do their best to be accommodating. Personally, in the last 2 years, I think I have grouped with 3-4 deaf people who said it up front and the rest of us typed as opposed to using voice chat to keep that person 'in the loop' and not alienate them.

Folks are not mind readers. Most married guys try to profess this to their wives everyday. You have to let someone know if something may become an issue so that plans can be made accordingly.

Try to sympathize with the party leader to some extent. We are only getting half of the story. For all we know what the party leader witnessed was this:

-person runs in quest and gets killed.
-person gets others killed by pulling too many mobs
-person doesn't respond to directions or communicate at all
-person gets the boot
-person suddenly is able to communicate

As this seems to be a likely scenario, I too can see where the party leader came from. Stating that they were deaf may just have appeared to be an excuse for poor play and after the fact at that.

As a side note, iirc, there is a mic icon on your group avatar (at least there used to be). It indicates whether or not your have voice chat enabled. If it's still there I'd suggest to turn it off making the icon disappear. Those that pay attention to details will pick up on that.

[ice4chill]

There should be a level of respect across the board in this game. There are so many people playing DDO that shouldn't be. It's a game for frikn sakes and one to enjoy and have fun.
I have ran with so many parties in ddo where you are constantly dealing with childish mannerisms and ignorance it's beyond pathetic.

Zergers, independents in parties, vulgars, non-coherants,always-talkers, etc. SUCK!

[Starla70]

There are some valid points here. First let me say I am the mother of a special needs child. So treatment like this bothers me. I see it increasing in daily life. It is sad a loss of respect. It also says something about the leader of the group. Not all leaders care about the group to begin with many just want that favor of the quest they missed and don't feel they can do it alone. The information box for quests is not big enough to state that.

I think the idea of posting something either in party or tell the leader of "no sound, but can type" Would be best, we have run with people who didn't speak English and for me I can sort of bungle through Spanish but that is all. We have a person with a disability in our guild. He was up front about it, and we work with it. Had another and worked with him as well. There are people willing to work with others. I would expect it more in non zerging guilds and players.

On a quest if our guild leadership is watching a player having issues we ask "You okay? Need anything?" Not all players would bother, many just kick you out. I do have a list of people I do not wish to run with again for things like that.

[Tiseria]

"find yourself a handicapped group gl"

That is some serious BS

[IllOracle]

This saddens me...
But, that we can squelch and no longer have to bother with the likes of these 'unmentionables' makes me happy.

[AidanRyuko]

mmm judging over others for their behavior/abilities.. happens ingame and on the forums.

there are plenty of people that don't know any etiquette when it comes to social interaction, but on the bright side the guy with the rude comment didn't disciminate. I find a lot of people act differently to someone with a handicap tho I dont understand why thats necesary in most cases.

Just play the game the way you like it and put idiots on ignore, the only way to escape those is to play singleplayer.

~aid