Booted from party because of a share request

[gloopygloop]

EDIT: And I ALWAYS ask for a share for Tempest's Spine - that has to be the longest pre-quest dialogue in the game.

Helpful tip: You can choose the first dialog option by hitting ctrl-F1. You can choose the second dialog option by hitting ctrl-F2.

Since the "correct" option to get through dialog is almost always the first option, you can zip through lots of dialog just by holding down the control key and hitting F1 a bunch of times.

If there is too much dialog for you to be willing to use that option, then the next alternative that you'll want is probably alt-F4.

[Handpicked]

To the boot happy, consider this.

If you boot a person without explaining why they are likely to become at least temporarally frustrated with trying to join a group. "So what?" you say? "Good!" You say? Keep reading.

That person if truly set on running that particular quest is not going to wait for your group to fill and another to pop up in who knows how long. They are going to put up a rival LFM ad with an overlapping level range for the exact same quest.

Now, as a person logging on with no prior knowledge of what transpired... seeing two identical unfilled groups up for the exact same thing is an immediate red flag. It lets me know that if nothing else, these two are either too oblivious to know that they put up a group when they should have joined one, OR they are so arrogant that they believe they need to lead the group, OR more likely.... for whatever reason they could not work together even for a short period of time.

I am unlikely to join either group, as I am sure are many others.
Sometimes you can chip a list of what you want down so finely that the only person that matches your criteria... is you. So be aware, because there is still a difference between lazy, new, clueless, and useless.

[MRMechMan]

To the boot happy, consider this.

If you boot a person without explaining why they are likely to become at least temporarally frustrated with trying to join a group. "So what?" you say? "Good!" You say? Keep reading.

That person if truly set on running that particular quest is not going to wait for your group to fill and another to pop up in who knows how long. They are going to put up a rival LFM ad with an overlapping level range for the exact same quest.

Now, as a person logging on with no prior knowledge of what transpired... seeing two identical unfilled groups up for the exact same thing is an immediate red flag. It lets me know that if nothing else, these two are either too oblivious to know that they put up a group when they should have joined one, OR they are so arrogant that they believe they need to lead the group, OR more likely.... for whatever reason they could not work together even for a short period of time.

I am unlikely to join either group, as I am sure are many others.
Sometimes you can chip a list of what you want down so finely that the only person that matches your criteria... is you. So be aware, because there is still a difference between lazy, new, clueless, and useless.

I doubt it. Someone saying "share plz" as the first words out of their mouth is code for "I don't know the quest" generally. Particularly if the quest is part of a chain and not sharable. They need to be directed where to go to even get the quest/get to the quest entrance. Or it is code for "I am lazy". Possibly also "I am rude and/or antisocial". None of which tend to be the types that put up lfms for that particular quest.

Not many people are truely set on running a particular quest. Even as a TR I don't have my quest progression set in stone-its more...do most of these quests at this level till farmed out, then move on, most of the quests at next level, then move on, etc.

Again, I don't boot for "share plz", but if I did the last thing I would be worried about would be rival lfms somehow diluting the talent pool. My quest is probably in progress at that point anyway.

[karsion]

I doubt it. Someone saying "share plz" as the first words out of their mouth is code for "I don't know the quest" generally. Particularly if the quest is part of a chain and not sharable. They need to be directed where to go to even get the quest/get to the quest entrance. Or it is code for "I am lazy". Possibly also "I am rude and/or antisocial". None of which tend to be the types that put up lfms for that particular quest.

I guess you have some proof to back what you said there. Me, I don't make assumptions like that. Sometimes people just ask for share cause it is quicker for everyone involved.

And I laugh at people claimin that "shr plz" is rude. I get that it more nice to type "Your excellency, excuse my meek self but I am just a dust and would be delighted if you could spend 5 seconds of your divine time to move your godly hand and share the awesome quest so I can enjoy your enlightening presence". And if they not kick them cause they are rude.

It is nice that some people who are against sharing are pointing out that context is king however most of them are just making blanket claims to the effect of " share request = kick".

Funny that.

[umeannothing]

I guess you have some proof to back what you said there. Me, I don't make assumptions like that. Sometimes people just ask for share cause it is quicker for everyone involved.

And I laugh at people claimin that "shr plz" is rude. I get that it more nice to type "Your excellency, excuse my meek self but I am just a dust and would be delighted if you could spend 5 seconds of your divine time to move your godly hand and share the awesome quest so I can enjoy your enlightening presence". And if they not kick them cause they are rude.

It is nice that some people who are against sharing are pointing out that context is king however most of them are just making blanket claims to the effect of " share request = kick".

Funny that.

I don't think I have ever found a quest within 5 seconds of opening my quest journal that was the correct one needed for a share.

And yes, having to search through every quest in my quest log for the right one is more annoying to me than it is for the 'shr plz' to get their own quest.

The best thing, would be if people didn't click on the LFM if they didn't have the quest to begin with, now I get spit happens, sometimes one thinks they have it but don't, and sometimes one wants a blip on their map, but you can open your own quest journal, spend "5" seconds looking to see if you have the quest/click on your own quest to get the blip on your map.

[karsion]

I don't think I have ever found a quest within 5 seconds of opening my quest journal that was the correct one needed for a share.

And yes, having to search through every quest in my quest log for the right one is more annoying to me than it is for the 'shr plz' to get their own quest.

The best thing, would be if people didn't click on the LFM if they didn't have the quest to begin with, now I get spit happens, sometimes one thinks they have it but don't, and sometimes one wants a blip on their map, but you can open your own quest journal, spend "5" seconds looking to see if you have the quest/click on your own quest to get the blip on your map.

You know there is a search option in quest log? Generally you need to type 2-3 letters of the uest name to get the riht one or get a list of 3-5 quests one of which is the right one. It might take up to 15 seconds depending on the player, I know that when I try to share there was usually someone who has done it quicker than me.

And once again, even if it would take you a minute it would be quicker in some situations than getting to the quest giver and back.

The thing that is strange to me, why are people so aggravated by a simple request? If you don't want to share - DON'T. There is a chance that someone else will. No need to boot someone without explanation.

[MysteryNotes]

Yeh, I've already visited that thread. More pointless griefing.
1st blind invite: educate
2nd blind invite: squelch

Education is griefing now?

???

[umeannothing]

You know there is a search option in quest log? Generally you need to type 2-3 letters of the uest name to get the riht one or get a list of 3-5 quests one of which is the right one. It might take up to 15 seconds depending on the player, I know that when I try to share there was usually someone who has done it quicker than me.

Exactly, so why shouldn't the 'shr plz' person use said search option before asking? Why is that the rest of the groups job?

Again, spit happens, I am one of those "retake the quest as soon as I turn it in" people, so I have little regard for those that do not to save a dialogue run through.

Walk up quests: I ALWAYS solo an explorer zone to get all the explorers before I join any LFM/start an LFM. I can set my own blip on my map, so others can as well, it is easy, like you said, there is a search function that usually only takes 15 seconds you said (My experiences differ, I usually get results as I enter each letter).

But what I quoted drives home the point, people are not without resources to take care of their own quest gathering.


EDIT: I make my post's this morning after having an LFM up for orchard clearly stating "train/rat farming ONLY. 1 slot saved for heals (my FVS hire/player if one joined). Come and go as you like"

And the first 2 people to join were insta booted for "can I get a share" and "plz shr quest"

[quijenoth]

I will happily ignore people who ask for shares on walk-up quests or quests where the quest giver is right outside entrance (or teleports you into the quest) but I have never booted someone for it.

Just a slight tangent on this thread...

How many people have had people quit a group because you ignored a "share" request?

my most bizarre involved a player that joined cabal for one (a walk-up) while the party was still in gianthold or heading to quest entrance.
The player asked for a share, no-one replied or offered a share.
The player asked a second time, I said over voice, "its a walk up dude, cant share",
The player leaves.

now I dunno if the player couldnt hear voice but leaving was pretty pointless and wasted our time getting to the quest and having to wait for a replacement.

[Stormanne]

I guess it depends on the context of the share request. But to all you that are defending the people whose first words to group are "shr plz," - Why are you so adamant about empowering lazy and rude behavior? Someone said it is hypocritical and lazy to boot instead of sharing, I say it's more of a refusal to empower the rude and lazy, when the context is there.

[gloopygloop]

I guess you have some proof to back what you said there. Me, I don't make assumptions like that. Sometimes people just ask for share cause it is quicker for everyone involved.

I didn't make assumptions like that when I started the game. Repeted experience with people who open a conversation with "shr plz" have taught me to make that assumption.

When something happens 15 or 20 times in a row, the assumption starts to look a lot more reasonable.

And I laugh at people claimin that "shr plz" is rude. I get that it more nice to type "Your excellency, excuse my meek self but I am just a dust and would be delighted if you could spend 5 seconds of your divine time to move your godly hand and share the awesome quest so I can enjoy your enlightening presence". And if they not kick them cause they are rude.

I'd rather that they just ask, "where can I find the quest?"

I'm always happy to teach someone to fish. I'm not so willing to give them a fish.

[Braegan]

How many people have had people quit a group because you ignored a "share" request?

Actually yes.

I've had folks get down right belligerent for not getting coddled into getting immediately granted their share requests. I had one guy call me an elitist pig, /squelch me and drop group...all because it was a walk-up that I didn't have. And yes I explained it twice that it was a walk-up and that I and no one else in the group had the quest yet to even share to him. I had a woman get very irrate with me and demanded: "Can I get a friggin' Share or what?!?!" Because she was standing five feet from the quest giver with the rest of the party and my initial response to the shr pls was to emote /point at the quest giver.

So it certainly goes both ways.

And agree it's all context. Some things I will share due to location of the quest giver and quest location, other things I'd rather you take the time and read and mayhaps learn something about what the quest is all about.

[mournbladereigns]

The proper etiquette is shr plox! and then to claim a particular piece of named lootz in the quest.

In summary, Don't hate the game, hate the playah!

[karsion]

I guess it depends on the context of the share request. But to all you that are defending the people whose first words to group are "shr plz," - Why are you so adamant about empowering lazy and rude behavior? Someone said it is hypocritical and lazy to boot instead of sharing, I say it's more of a refusal to empower the rude and lazy, when the context is there.

How is saying please rude? Is using contractions rude? To the English language perhaps but to the players?

I am not defending people asking for shares, cause there is no need. I am just slightly amused for people saying that asking for share is rude and kicking without explanation is hunky dory.

Exactly, so why shouldn't the 'shr plz' person use said search option before asking? Why is that the rest of the groups job?

Again, spit happens, I am one of those "retake the quest as soon as I turn it in" people, so I have little regard for those that do not to save a dialogue run through.

Walk up quests: I ALWAYS solo an explorer zone to get all the explorers before I join any LFM/start an LFM. I can set my own blip on my map, so others can as well, it is easy, like you said, there is a search function that usually only takes 15 seconds you said (My experiences differ, I usually get results as I enter each letter).

EDIT: I make my post's this morning after having an LFM up for orchard clearly stating "train/rat farming ONLY. 1 slot saved for heals (my FVS hire/player if one joined). Come and go as you like"

And the first 2 people to join were insta booted for "can I get a share" and "plz shr quest"

Cause it won't help if someone does the search when he doesn't have the quest. he will still need to run to the quest-giver. C'mon!

Ok, you ask everyone to play the way you do? That is very egotistic.

You see, and that is I can get behind, someone joining didn't have a clue what was written in the LFM description. I could still argue there is a uest in Necropolis that involves rats and you still could have explained why you did boot them but at least in context it made sense.

I just find it funny that people justify being an ass to others for breaking the laws that has been never stated.

Edit: And yeah, I was many times in a quest where someone asked for sharing of a quest where the quest giver is at the entrance (von 1-2 for example) and I would be amused that they ask and sometimes make fun of it but sometimes you have to remember there are casual players here and not everyone knows the location of every single quest/questgiver.

[Gorbadoc]

3- What is even worse, if you are completely new to the quest, have absolutely no clue of where the quest giver/quest entrance is, and then you "forget" to mention any of these, but say "share plox" instead of "hello" on joining the group. This will not only show the others that you dont know the quest at all, as mentioned above, but also that you try to hide this fact, and they can expect the same behaviour from you in the quest, so you are possibly not worth taking with the group.

Unfortunately this last case is very common, and made some of the players impatient about this issue. Sometimes if they see a share request, they get on their boots of kicking pretty fast.

As a general rule of thumb, in groups, politeness takes you far. Being up front and honest about things, takes you even further.

This.

A good teammate should have two of the following:
1) Knowing the quest.
2) Being good at communicating.
3) Being patient and committed to figuring out how to get the job done.

When someone says "Share please" with no context for the statement, I worry that it means they're missing one or more of the above. When I lead a party, I try to be patient. Everyone has their part to play in helping communication, though.

Be a good communicator: Be polite, and be candid about why you might need a share (just like Cogdoc said). And when you get an impatient grump for a party leader, laugh it off and move on.

Oh, and when you get a really silly party leader, post it on the forums, so we can all laugh.

[gloopygloop]

How is saying please rude? Is using contractions rude? To the English language perhaps but to the players?

Requesting or demanding something from someone before you even say hello is rude.

When my kids say, "Can I have juice?" as the first words in the morning, I tell them to go back into their room and come out with a "Good morning" before they ask for anything.

I expect at least that level of courtesy from adults.

I've done that at work, too. If someone walks up to me and says, "Can I get a copy of last week's TPS report?" then I'm pretty likely to answer, "I'm doing fine, thanks for asking. How are you today?"

It's not hard to open a conversation with "Hello", "Heya", "gruss Gott", "Shalom" or even "omw" before asking for something.

I am not defending people asking for shares, cause there is no need. I am just slightly amused for people saying that asking for share is rude and kicking without explanation is hunky dory.

I also think that kicking without explanation is rude. Sometimes, being rude is useful. When you're asking someone to do something for you, being rude is not useful.

[Vint]

Ok, you ask everyone to play the way you do? That is very egotistic.

My LFM will usually have the know the quest in it. When someone at random hits the lfm and says "shr plz", (and it is tempest, walk up, or something of the sort), am I to assume that they know the quest?

You can call me an elitest all you want, but I am being up front with people. Would it be nicer if I put nothing in the description and then yelled at them for not knowing the quest?

If the description box is empty, then I do not think it is right for the leader to boot them. But in my situation I am asking for an experienced person. Is that rude? Is that egotistical? It is your descision, but don't come ruin my play time if you cant meet the requirements.

[umeannothing]

You see, and that is I can get behind, someone joining didn't have a clue what was written in the LFM description. I could still argue there is a uest in Necropolis that involves rats and you still could have explained why you did boot them but at least in context it made sense.

You should re read my previous post, at no part of the post did I say 'necropolis'. I clearly stated Orchard. That is nowhere near the necro 3 chain with the rats in the maze you are referring to, and unless you want to collect some spoiled meat, there is no farming of much but scarabs in there either.


If you want to split hairs and say it is ok to ask for a share, and yet say it is NOT ok to be expected by others to have the quest before clicking the join on the LFm, well, you are certainly entitled to that opinion, same as I am entitled to mine.

[BitkaCK2]

Huh... guess not I had to double check OP's posting date because I could have sworn I had seen it 2 years ago. *shrug* If you hate "shr plz" to the point of getting stressed don't PuG.

My 2c,
bitkaCK2

[BOgre]

Education is griefing now?

???

heheh, nice reading comrehension fail. Shall I clarify?

the thread in question is full of more of this same type of elitist griefing. My response to blind invites is to first educate the sender that blind invites are considered to be rude, and that a /tell in advance to introduce one's self can go a long way towards having your invitation accepted. Then if a second blind invite from the same person follows closely enough after the first for me to remember the offender's name, I move on to my second option, which is to press ignore/squelch. This to me seems to be a far superior method of dealing with an anoying player, versus the methods described in this and other threads.
Consider this reply my step one.