Things kobolds should say

[Purgatory]

Kobold lag bad, kobold cant even move.

[Yan_PL]

Kobold angry! Kobold ragequits!

[easyaction]

Kobald has waterworks, you pay kobald 4 times roll of dice, if kobald owns both utilities pay kobald TEN times roll of dice!!

[MrkGrismer]

"NERF IT! Nerf it! Why do they always nerf everything?? .... ooooooh soft and cuddly..."

[domandi]

"I'm a kobold Jim, not a hobgoblin!"

[Alrik_Fassbauer]

how about: "Kobold wanted to be adventurer... but afraid of arrows"

That's one of the most serious (read : best in my mind) suggestions.


My suggestion would be :

"We Kobolds will be here long after you softies are gone !"

Or something like : "We Kobolds will remain when everyone else is gone !"

Something like that. Because like in real life, the most underrated ones are those who will remain. Scorpions, for example, exist - s a "race" for hundreds of millions of years now ... They can even survive A-Bombs ... Scorpions, cockroaches and rats, they'll be here long after humanity might be gone (if ever).

Similar to Kobolds : They'll just remain. They might be small, but that's also their surviving strategy; plus, they live there were neither humans, elves or warves would want to live. Hence they are adapted to the worst living environments - and this just "hardens" them.

[scipiojedi]

kobold rogue: "YARK! sneak attack!"
Kobold thrower: "yark, kobold squishy but has max ranks in jump and umd"
Kobold shaman: "yark, me make adventurereres jelous. ma has arcane and divine spells"

kobold shaman at kobold thrower: "YARK no throw fire! it burns dark mist magiks"


Actualy as kobolds are in all the nooby learner dungeons it would be kinda nice if they sorta gave tips...(in a funny kobold way)

"yark, kobold so squishy! kobold needs to be tough like bear to fight adventurers"
"

Kobold druid turn into bear to fight with adventurers!

[LrdSlvrhnd]

Although in a way, it's even sadder that at the late hour of his death, he realizes the importance of family and reconciliation, and then you burn/stab/oxidize/crush him to death.

This is a horrible quest.

It's not *quite* as horrible as Purge the Heretics. Bunch of peaceful Sovereign-Host-worshipping peasants, and you kick down the doors and slaughter them all just because a Silver Flame Inquisitor asks you to. "Nobody expects the SF Inquisition!" I always feel dirty after running it, and I have several characters who just plain haven't.

...And then of course, you run Lords of Dust and learn the truth...

Back on topic: "Kobold tell Aussira... Aussicora.... Aussira.... big white dragon on you!"

[Enderoc]

In Durk's (I think) one of the Kobold Bros says something when he dies - I believe it's "Kobolds should work together." (I think he's the only one that says it.)

Every time I kill that little SOB, I feel a little sad when he says that. Like he's been trying all his life to better the circumstances of his species, realizing all the while their failings, but trying anyway, so hard... and then a bunch of snot-nosed 2nd-levels fresh off the boat kick in the door and slaughter everyone. And his dying thought is one of mingled sadness and contempt for his species, seeing his dream fade to black.

OK, that's a big overwrought, but it does make me wonder.

that's the real reason why there is no true "evil" in this campaign setting. Although my definition of evil is imposing your will upon another without any regard for their person. Which clearly there is definitely evil in this world and others.

[Hafeal]

Day of the Necro.

Well, this thread deserves some rep to be passed around, even if it may be "again."

[Certon]

"Used to be adventurer like you, but then took arrow to the knee!"