Things I learned while playing DDO

[Daerius of the Blessed Blades]

In my 4 1/2 years of gameplay, I have learned some very valuable lessons from my fellow Ghallandans. Here are a few I wanted to share so you won't make the same mistakes or experience the same let-downs that I have over the years.


1. Just because I am the bard does not mean I have free license to perform 80's karaoke over voice chat.

2. The party will usually tolerate my Thief Acrobat saying ‘It’s Showtiiiiiime” every time I click the boost, but get really annoyed when I imitate Liza Minelli while doing so.

3. Greasing the trash on the eVON bases is not considered effective crowd control.

4. No matter how many times I email Turbine, I remain unable to get an option to replace my guild airship bartender Sully with Issac from the Love Boat.

5. The Twelve are not the most powerful casters in all of Eberron or they’d be able to conjure up a bridge that aligns with the front door of their tower. In reality, they are sadists who enjoy watching players run headfirst out the door and into the lava.

6. There is no Coin-Lord version of OSHA, or all the harbor ramps would require handrails.

7. Greasing the stairs in ToD part two is not considered an effective way to draw Shadow Devil agro.

8. No level of favor will grant my guild ship a “Hot Tub Time Machine”.

9. I cannot choose the option ‘Mullet’ when purchasing a hairstyle. This needs to be hotfixed immediately.

10. Regardless of faith, all DDO clerics must actually get their powers from Dionysus. Why else could we regain SP and change spells in a tavern, but not in a church? (Thanks to Dresek for sharing this lesson)

11. Newbies in the harbor will NOT find Venn alive and an extra chest if they finish WW part 3 faster…but I still love spreading that rumor.

12. Singing the “oompa loompa” song whenever the Halfling joins my PUG will get you squelched.

13. Linking ‘neutralize poison’ pots when asked for a ‘poison resist’ in Shroud gets you tagged as ‘rude’.

14. Using Greater Teleport to send your party to the Twilight Forge instead of back to Meridia is not funny to anyone except me.

15. The DM’s won’t help me buy a chainmail bikini armor skin for my male cleric so I can role play a patron of Ryu-Pahl, Queen of the Cross Dressers.

16. I should refrain from using Greater Dispel Magic repeatedly on party members just to make sure my spell pen is ‘working’.

17. Asking Half Orc players repeatedly to ‘squeal like a pig, boy!’ will get you reported.

Any others that you would like to share are more than welcome...

[MeliCat]

Make sure it's accidental when you cast firewall on the end boss in Inferno - he's undead right? And blue? So firewall is good.

[voodoogroves]

14. This is patently false. It's hilarious anytime. Also from DQ to the Twilight Isles or whatever.

[Draccus]

What's sad is that I know Branwynn was very vocally upset about #9.

[adsecula]

All i could think of while I read your very fun list was: "But trust me on the sunscreen."

[donfilibuster]

Oozes have learned to open a plate armored mail from the backside. It's only natural.

Kobolds can be so much more likeable when Garl Glittergold is not around.

Where do rangers learn their evasion? from running through trees?

[Ganak]

4. No matter how many times I email Turbine, I remain unable to get an option to replace my guild airship bartender Sully with Issac from the Love Boat.[/COLOR]

Please keep trying. Keep hope alive!

[Daerius of the Blessed Blades]

Please keep trying. Keep hope alive!

Exactly. I mean, really, Sully or the cool cat below? I rest my case...

[demtutor]

18. The bard song Inspire Competence does not actually improve a players skill, but can be a useful way of telling them they suck

[Cernunan]

Strangely, if you put up an lfm that reads

Abbot raid, know the quest, know the puzzles, all are welcome

Nobody seems to join
go figure

[hingu_Doy]

Strangely, if you put up an lfm that reads

Abbot raid, know the quest, know the puzzles, all are welcome

Nobody seems to join
go figure

lol!

[Anthios888]

Wow, this thread is a real eye-opener. I need to go kill myself.

[Rubiconn]

- Its best to not talk about how great your gear is until the quest is over, most likely as uber as you think you are you will be the first to die in a horribly stupid way.

- Paladins not rogues are the best at finding traps - at least my paly is.

- never be in so much of a rush after /death taxi to meridia for a shroud run that you jump of the edge of the bar before you have more than 10 hp.

[Daerius of the Blessed Blades]

Wow, this thread is a real eye-opener. I need to go kill myself.

If you could /death in real life and end up in a bar, I think I might join you

[KreepyKritter]

-- Key binding your push to talk to your alt key is not a good way of freeing up your 'F' key.

-- The 'Hands Free' option is intended only for voice chat...

-- 'Hands Free' is a terrible idea for people with children under 6.

-- 'Hands Free' is hilarious when one of your group members has an especially amorous GF/BF who is feeling grabby during a PUG.

-- Any time some on in a PUG yells 'LEROY JENKINS!' something awful or hilarious will result. Often both.

-- Telling your guild leader HE needs to 'Put your big girl panties on' will result in 'bad things'(tm)

-- No one else in the PUG thinks it's funny when I yell 'LEROY JENKINS' in VoN, and then run into Velah's mouth.

-- Newbies do not think being told to attack 'That Other Portal' in Shroud is as funny as I do... but I'll keep doing it anyway.

[txnroger]

15. Putting the D-Door over the deep lava in VONs5 and making everyone jump to take it, while hilarious, will likely make the Clerics not heal you.

16. Casting grease on the chest below the landing and above the deep lava in VONs5, again while hilarious, will likely get you banned from the party.

[txnroger]

Sorry, used the wrong numbers. Should have probably been like 19 and 20 or somewhere around there.

[Raiderone]

...Having Hands Free Open Mic is not a good IDEA when you have a ROOSTER crowing in the background....

...Going AFK while ROOSTER is Crowing during SHROUD run is a sure way to get SQUELCHED permantently...

True.. Ask S. T. F. U.

[Fancy_A_Fling]

2. The party will usually tolerate my Thief Acrobat saying ‘It’s Showtiiiiiime” every time I click the boost, but get really annoyed when I imitate Liza Minelli while doing so.

Any others that you would like to share are more than welcome...[/QUOTE]

Baaaaalllz to you! (this comment was stated by Liza Minelli in an hr long interview.. ) Glad you care to share your knowledge of the game to other's but i disagree with the comment "greasing Bases in Evon is not effective Crowd Control" its very effective.. espeically at wiping/kicking somene off a base and giving them a free teleport to the Marketplace.

[AZgreentea]

Lets see.

17. No matter what is introduced, someone will find a reason to complain about it. Usually loudly and frequently.

18. If something gets fixed, people will complain that something else is not fixed.

I have also discovered that these two apply to just about everything in the real world as well.