A Rogue's Guide to Kill-Count Padding

[Draccus]

The kill count displayed in the quest summary tab is the most important piece of data for a rogue. While many rogues spend hours a day arguing about meaningless stats, like dex, strength, AC or sneak attack dice, an elite rogue knows the only number that matters is the number of kills next to your name.

Leading the kill count is good for you, good for your reputation, and good for the class in general. There is a reason you see all those ToD LFM's today stating "need more rogues!!11!!." It's because of the years of work some of us veteran rogues have put into developing the rogue's rep as the game's top killer. So the next time you log in and are flooded with the typical blind raid invites and /tells asking…nay…begging you to join their group, you can thank a veteran kill count padder. You're welcome.

So what can you do to help? Simple. You can learn to pad your kill count like the rest of us. Every time a rogue finishes a quest without leading the kill count, a ranger dies. Hmm…scratch that, as that would actually be a good thing. Let's just say that you are doing irreparable damage to the class if you don't lead the kill count. It should be your mission. Your vision. Your goal in DDO. Leading the kill count is more important than finishing the quest, helping fellow party members, loot, or being a good teammate. Kills > All. "But Dresek," you're asking, "I don't have an uber build with tons of great gear! How can I lead the kill count?" Shut up, put on your big-girl panties, and read on.

Kill Count Padding for Rogues:

1. Pick the right quest:

See those big numbers you get when attacking something that's alive? See how they go away when attacking undead? Little numbers = little kills so stop attacking the undead. "But Dresek," you're whining, "What about all those quests with undead in them?" Don't run 'em. Just don't run undead quests…ever. The only undead quest I would run is the Abbot because there aren't enough kills in there for anyone to pay attention to anyway. "But Dresek," you're whining, "I NEED some gear from the quests…and how do I flag for Abbot without running undead quests?" Fine. If you must run them, pike them. Finishing dead last with 0 kills is the only alternative to leading the kill count. More on that later, but, in the meantime, stay the hell out of undead quests.

2. Pick the right target:

Look at the icon next to your name. See how it's shows that dark guy on the purple background sneaking around? That's how we play -- sneaky. And I'm not talking about the stealth skills here, they're too slow. Just get rid of any notions you may have of heroically fighting the most dangerous mob in the room. Let those mamby-pamby paladins do that. "But Dresek," you're asking, "What about protecting the healers and casters?" Protect the cleric? Yeah, right. The last thing a cleric needs in this game is protection. They can probably solo whatever quest you're running and are half AFK while watching Glee anyway. Let the "everything attack ME!" screaming fighter do that. Casters? As long as you have haste, ignore them. What you should be 100% focused on is selecting the weakest target in the room. While the rest of your party members are bravely surrounding the big bad guy, you should be on the edges, killing the lowest hit point mobs in the game. The kill count list doesn't have pictures. A baby glass spider is worth exactly as many kills as Arraetrikos: 1.

POP QUIZ!

I enter a room and see a lot of different monsters. Which one should I attack:
[ ] Elite Orthon Defender
[ ] Dense Earth Elemental
[ ] Suulomades
[ ] Kobold Thrower

Answer: If you need the answer, please reroll as a paladin.

3. Steal. Steal more. Steal again. Steal like..well…a rogue.

The TAB key is a kill count padder's best friend. You should wear this key out tabbing through the mobs to find the one with the lowest health. Let Mr. Epic Sword of Shadows 70 Strength Barbarian take 99% of the mob's hit points with his 1700hp crit. All you need is that last hit point with a 28-point poke of your rapier and you get the white skull. Kill stealing is an art and you need to be Michelangelo. "But Dresek," you're whining, "won't other players be mad if I keep stealing their kills." Yes. Yes they will. And that makes it all the more rewarding. Remember, the early bird gets the worm but the second mouse gets the cheese.

4. Ignore traps.

Yes, disarming traps is heaps and heaps of fun *eyeroll*. Do that when you solo. Because when you're doing THAT, you aren't doing what you should be doing: KILLING. Why do you think rogues have evasion? Is it to avoid getting killed by a trap while you disarm it? Absolutely not. You have evasion so you can run through every trap and kill the mobs on the other side while your party stands at the trap wondering if you're going to come back and disarm it. Traps are like getting that double-square card in Candyland. You get to jump two spaces ahead of everyone else.

"But Dresek," you're whining, "What if someone gets killed in a trap?" PERFECT! That's what you want! Instead of delaying one character, you've now delayed TWO characters: one dead one and one to raise him. Getting someone killed in a trap you ran through is like pulling Queen Frostine in Candyland -- you get to go WAY ahead of everyone. (and, in case you're wondering, my 4-year old is hooked on Candyland, hence the analogies).

5. Let other people play with puzzles, levers, doors, boxes, quest-item chests, etc.

Same as above. When you are playing with those, you're not killing. Stand at the door and let someone else pull the lever or turn the valve. Anything you can do to delay your opponents…er…party members, is a good thing.

POP QUIZ!

Rank the following activities in order of importance, from least to most.
[ ] Disarming the lightning trap that has killed half your party.
[ ] Sneaking past a bearded devil to pull a lever.
[ ] Recovering a party member's soulstone who fell in lava.
[ ] Attacking an ogre that is at 5% health.
[ ] UMD'ing a heal scroll on the Ranger who's near death.

Answer: lol…"heal a ranger"…rofl. Sometimes I crack myself up.

6. Choose optionals carefully.

An amateur kill count padder thinks he simply needs to hit optional areas of dungeons to lead the kill count. That's not necessarily true. Optional areas can be ignored IF everyone else ignores them. Like the old joke about running from a bear goes, I don't have to outrun the bear, I just have to outrun YOU. If an opponent…er…party member heads off to pad his count in an optional area, you go with him. If no one goes, stay put. The last thing you want is to be messing around with a 5-kill optional while the rest of the party jumps into the 30-kill end fight. The best time to seek optional areas is when players are AFK. That's a virtual kill-count gold mine. Tell people "I'm just going to ensure we get Conquest."

7. Monitor your progress constantly.

Remember when you were in Drivers Ed. and they taught you to scan the road, then your mirrors, then road again? Constantly pull up the Quest Progress window and see how you're doing. "But Dresek," you're whining again, "How does knowing where I stand help me get more kills." It doesn't. But what it does for you is put in the position to know if winning the kill count is attainable or not. If you determine you won't win, it's time to stop killing and start piking. Remember, you have two options: Lead the kill count or finish dead last. Being in the middle is unacceptible because it indicates you were trying but failed. Remember the old adage: Winners never quit and quitters never win. But if you never win and never quit, you're an idiot.

8. Finally, when you win, ensure everyone knows you won.

It does neither you nor me…er…rogues…any good to win the kill count if the entire party doesn't know it. Sure, you can simply TELL people you won it but that lacks style and may give away the fact that you were focused on winning. The key to announcing your victory without letting people know you are announcing your victory is to trick them into checking the kill count screen. "But Dresek," you're whining, "How can I get them to check without telling them to check?" It's just like fishing for compliments by complimenting someone else. Here are a couple simple examples.

Say you've got 204 kills in Coal Chamber and a ranger in your group has 37. Compliment him on his kills!
"Wow, Leggollaass, that's a good number of kills. Who says Arcane Archers don't do any damage? I'm gonna have to roll one up some day. What's your build?" Everyone will pull up the kill count and see your huge 204 without even being asked. Brilliant!

Or, you can simply comment on the total number of kills. This is even easier with epic quests by remarking on the number of scrolls you got. "Man, this sucks. We killed 98 mobs in epic ADQ and only got 14 scrolls!" People will naturally pull up the quest window to verify your claim and there they'll see your shining example of uber. It doesn't matter that 14 scrolls would be a ridiculously unbelieveable number of scrolls. Say it anyway.

FINAL EXAM!

If you find yourself nearing the end of a quest and realize it's impossible to lead the kill count, you should:

[ ] Compliment the leader on his skill and build.
[ ] Ignore it and hope no one notices.
[ ] Blame lag and the fact that your build really doesn't become effective until your 5th TR and six +4 Tomes.
[ ] Feign a disconnection and log off to play Candyland.
[ ] Reroll

Answer: Feign a disconnection and log off to play Candyland…then reroll.

[ChaosEmperorDragon]

lol nice!

[Intension]

Simply... +1

point 8 made me laugh loud... my coworkers are watching me suspiciously now...


PS: we all know rogues are gimpy and lack DPS, can you tell me a couple of tricks how raise my kill count in epic where assassinate and vorpal doesn't work? ty in advance

[khaldan]

But Dresek, what do I do for a 5% xp trinket before threnal? I can't go until 9 without my free xp!

+1'd for making me fall out of my chair laughing.

[Aranticus]

9. Pick the correct party to join!

Given that there are 2 groups, one with a super uber caster and his insane wf barb friend and another with 2 doorstop pales and a ftr/wiz, do not join the former! The more damage capable players there are, the less chance you get to kill anything

[chaos_master]

1. Haste Boost
2. Jorgundal's Collar
3. Vorpals
4. ????
5. KILLCOUNT PROFIT!

P.S. Last night on a Hard VoD, top 3 killcount leaders were the three rogues in the group, me included!
/shameless boasting off

[gott_ist_tot]

So... that's how you're doing it. Next time I'm gonna roll on each of the 14 scrolls.

P.S. They should seriously add 'backstab party memeber' option when you're near a chest with chance to snatch his treasure.

[FlyingTurtle]

Kill Padding 101!!!!!!11!

1. Never be the first to enter the room
2. Pick your targets carefully, preferably ones that are already being engaged by good DPS
3. Take your time, come up behind them, and sneak attack
4. If you get aggro, you're doing it wrong

No, wait, that's Basic Rogue skills 101. Hmmmmmm! I smell something sneaky going on here!

[Baloran]

Great job you did here - makes me want to roll a rogue

Cheers & thanks for the laughs

Baloran

[Bolo_Grubb]

+1 for making me laugh with a well written and entertaining post.

edit: doh must have given you a +1 somewhere else recently.

[Legohaiden]

Good stuff there, got a couple of good chuckles out of me. +1

[CrimsonEagle]

Holy ****....I have been playing all my characters as a rogue should be played???!!!!!

This is awesome

+1

[kamimitsu]

Dear Dresek,

Please stop doing that voodoo-mind-stealing thing and get out of my head.

A few tidbits to add that I think you may have missed:

1. On getting folks to open the XP report and notice your awesomesauce: Rather than complementing the competition, complement the weakest party member for getting his low number of kills. This is especially effective if they are near a ranger in the kill count. "Hey, HealingBotForU! Nice work on getting 4 kills, you almost caught Legolllasss!"

2. Since you'll be constantly checking the XP report, be sure to tell the party whenever you reach Onslaught, Aggression, or Conquest. They will likely check the validity of your claim and marvel at your elite skills.

3. Breakables! You can nonchalantly reference the breakables to ensure folks open the XP report window. "Hey guys, we don't even have Mischief yet! Find some crates!"

4. More on breakables. If you cannot win the kill count, your next target should be to win the breakables count. Be sure to berate other players for their insufficient barrel-hate. "What?! You don't like extra XP?! My cousin is a cooper (barrel-maker for the vocabulary challenged) and he needs all the help he can get in this economy!"

Note: Methods 1-3 should not be employed unless you are solidly ahead in the kill count, as the last thing you want is the Barbarian to "wise-up" (uhmm... does that even happen?) and start kill-blocking you. Mind you, if that does happen it does make it all the sweeter when he still loses the Kill Count!

Yours sincerely,

Shiz

[SINIBYTE]

A Rogue's Guide to Kill-Count Padding

Pure Genius. +1.

Also: This is an excellent guides for monks as well. Kill Sniping is every monks favorite pasttime.

Also: Dresek, RACE YA!

[sephiroth1084]

I keep wondering why groups put the rogues on the elemental in Shroud 2, and the eles in ToD 1...sure they have evasion, but anyone else will be able to DPS the thing better. I hate when my rogue gets assigned to this because then I don't see all those lovely numbers streaming across the screen.

[Quarterling]

Rangers, who needs 'em?

+1

[Nospheratus]

This post simply made my day!!!

Brilliant! Absolutely brilliant!


I'll have to come back later to +rep you!

[Anthios888]

-1 rep, this brilliance was supposed to stay in guild... now other people will be stealin' all the kills.

[Anthios888]

2. Jorgundal's Collar

Does not stack with haste. As Dresek indicated, that's what the sorc is for!

[jurzey]

Good laugh. Thanks.