There's really not much more to it than that - can't get past the launcher because it attempts to download the aforementioned "Splash Screen" - upwards of 10 minutes and counting with no result, leaving me unable to log in at all.
Not sure what happened overnight to cause this problem, but hoping there's a workaround or simple fix for what seems to be a simple error, because I'm not really interested in any overly lengthy solution like redownloading, with a low-grade DSL shared connection, that's pretty much days I don't want to waste trying not to bring household internet traffic to a halt.
Hopefully this isn't a unique issue, so something can be suggested that's a bit more workable. In the meantime, retrying the launcher in hopes it'll resolve itself, but not really optimistic after several retries already.