Some scenes from the unreleased Argo drama movie ...

[totmacher]

Handee: Why didn't you bring any weapons, something more advanced? Don't you have, uh, epic vorpals? Show me a piece of future technology.
Larry: You go naked. Something about the field generated by a living sack. Nothing dead will go.
Handee: Why?
Larry: I didn't build the ****ing thing!
Handee: Okay, okay. But this warforged, if it's metal...
Larry: Surrounded by living tissue!
Handee: Right. Now, why were the other two women killed?
Larry: Most of the records were lost in the war. Tink knew almost nothing about Temp's mother. Her full name, where she lives. They just knew the city. The Tinkinator was just being systematic.
Handee: Uh-huh. Okay, now let's get back to...
Larry: [interrupts] Look! You've heard enough! I have answered your questions! Now I have to see Tab!
Handee: I'm afraid that's not up to me.
Larry: Then why am I talking to you? Who is an authority here?
Handee: Please, I...
Larry: [interrupts again] Shut up!
Larry: [looks into the monitor]
Larry: You still don't get it, do you? He'll find her! That's what he does! It's *all* he does! You can't stop him! He'll wade through you! He'll reach down her throat and tear her ****in' lesser heart of wood out!
Larry: [being restrained]
Larry: Let go of me!

--

Tab: Larry. Why me? Why's it want me? Is it because I'm gay?
Larry: There was a forum war. A few years from now, all this, this whole place, everything, it's gone. Just gone. There were survivors. Here, there. Nobody even knew who started it. It was the trolls, Tab.
Tab: I don't understand.
Larry: Defense network trollbots. New... powerful... hooked into everything, trusted to grief it all. They say it got smart allecked, a new order of trolltelligence. Then it saw all people as a threat, not just the ones on the other side. Decided our fate in a microsecond: epic griefing.
Tab: Did you see this war?
Larry: No. I grew up after. In the ruins... starving... hiding from F-T's.
Tab: F-T's?
Larry: Forum-Trolls. Hi welcome spam bots built in automated factories. Most of us were rounded up, put in camps for orderly trollsposal.
[Pulls up his right sleeve, exposing a mark]
Larry: This is burned in by laser scan. Some of us were kept alive... to work... loading forum accounts into dumpsters and incinerators. The disposal units ran night and day. We were that close to going out forever. But there was one man who taught us to fight, to storm the wire of the Argo boards, to smash those metal motherlovers into decent wholesome postings. He turned it around. He brought us back from the brink. His name is Temp. Tempshot Roopants. Your son, Tab, your unborn son.

---

The Tinkinator: [picking up shroud items] The greensteel repeating heavy crossbow.
Danny: That's New Zealander. You can go pump or sheep.
[Hands The Tinkinator a crossbow]
The Tinkinator: The epic sos, with laser sighting.
Danny: [Hands The Tinkinator a epic sos] These are brand new; we just got them in. That's a good greatsword. Just touch me in my naughty parts, the beam comes on and you put the red dot where you want the bolt to go. You can't miss. Anything else?
The Tinkinator: Phased plasma rifle in the 40-watt range.
Danny: Hey, just what you see hija.
The Tinkinator: [Looks around] The mineral 2 khopesh.
Danny: You know your weapons, buddy. Any one of these is ideal for home defense. So uh, which will it be?
The Tinkinator: [Pointing the greensteel crossbow towards the door] All.
Danny: I may close early today. There's a 15-day wait on the epic weapons but the noob cannon you can take right now.
[Takes out forms]
Danny: and you have to fill these out too.
[Sees The Tinkinator loads her curse word filter]
Danny: You can't do that.
The Tinkinator: Wrong. *%#&%$&#$*#$*#
[Shoots Danny]

[Quietstorm]

Handee: Why didn't you bring any weapons, something more advanced? Don't you have, uh, epic vorpals? Show me a piece of future technology.
Larry: You go naked. Something about the field generated by a living sack. Nothing dead will go.
Handee: Why?
Larry: I didn't build the ****ing thing!
Handee: Okay, okay. But this warforged, if it's metal...
Larry: Surrounded by living tissue!
Handee: Right. Now, why were the other two women killed?
Larry: Most of the records were lost in the war. Tink knew almost nothing about Temp's mother. Her full name, where she lives. They just knew the city. The Tinkinator was just being systematic.
Handee: Uh-huh. Okay, now let's get back to...
Larry: [interrupts] Look! You've heard enough! I have answered your questions! Now I have to see Tab!
Handee: I'm afraid that's not up to me.
Larry: Then why am I talking to you? Who is an authority here?
Handee: Please, I...
Larry: [interrupts again] Shut up!
Larry: [looks into the monitor]
Larry: You still don't get it, do you? He'll find her! That's what he does! It's *all* he does! You can't stop him! He'll wade through you! He'll reach down her throat and tear her ****in' lesser heart of wood out!
Larry: [being restrained]
Larry: Let go of me!

--

Tab: Larry. Why me? Why's it want me? Is it because I'm gay?
Larry: There was a forum war. A few years from now, all this, this whole place, everything, it's gone. Just gone. There were survivors. Here, there. Nobody even knew who started it. It was the trolls, Tab.
Tab: I don't understand.
Larry: Defense network trollbots. New... powerful... hooked into everything, trusted to grief it all. They say it got smart allecked, a new order of trolltelligence. Then it saw all people as a threat, not just the ones on the other side. Decided our fate in a microsecond: epic griefing.
Tab: Did you see this war?
Larry: No. I grew up after. In the ruins... starving... hiding from F-T's.
Tab: F-T's?
Larry: Forum-Trolls. Hi welcome spam bots built in automated factories. Most of us were rounded up, put in camps for orderly trollsposal.
[Pulls up his right sleeve, exposing a mark]
Larry: This is burned in by laser scan. Some of us were kept alive... to work... loading forum accounts into dumpsters and incinerators. The disposal units ran night and day. We were that close to going out forever. But there was one man who taught us to fight, to storm the wire of the Argo boards, to smash those metal motherlovers into decent wholesome postings. He turned it around. He brought us back from the brink. His name is Temp. Tempshot Roopants. Your son, Tab, your unborn son.

---

The Tinkinator: [picking up shroud items] The greensteel repeating heavy crossbow.
Danny: That's New Zealander. You can go pump or sheep.
[Hands The Tinkinator a crossbow]
The Tinkinator: The epic sos, with laser sighting.
Danny: [Hands The Tinkinator a epic sos] These are brand new; we just got them in. That's a good greatsword. Just touch me in my naughty parts, the beam comes on and you put the red dot where you want the bolt to go. You can't miss. Anything else?
The Tinkinator: Phased plasma rifle in the 40-watt range.
Danny: Hey, just what you see hija.
The Tinkinator: [Looks around] The mineral 2 khopesh.
Danny: You know your weapons, buddy. Any one of these is ideal for home defense. So uh, which will it be?
The Tinkinator: [Pointing the greensteel crossbow towards the door] All.
Danny: I may close early today. There's a 15-day wait on the epic weapons but the noob cannon you can take right now.
[Takes out forms]
Danny: and you have to fill these out too.
[Sees The Tinkinator loads her curse word filter]
Danny: You can't do that.
The Tinkinator: Wrong. *%#&%$&#$*#$*#
[Shoots Danny]

Its obvious you work for a government contractor...busy today thomas?

[Ughh]

TOT: ayeayeayeayeayeayeaye I like you Larry, i kill you last
Larry: Tot, calm down the pain in your head is probly a tumor
TOT: It's not a TUMA

[toughguyjoe]

Tot: You're a funny guy Larry. Thats why i'm going to kill you last.

Tot: Hey Larry, remember when I said I'd kill you last?
Larry: Thats right Macher! You did say you'd kill me last!!!
Tot: I lied.

[ArkoHighStar]

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to totmacher again.

[ArkoHighStar]

[Galacticus]

+1 Rep Tommy! Nice...but why am I the store clerk? I don't own any WOMD's

[Newtons_Apple]

So tell me again when is the scene when Tab, Blah and Alex sing "My Little Buttercup" in spanish?

[Rameses]

-1 Rep! Not enuff me in it.


I am, Rameses!

[Jonny_D]

Mhykke: *Consider yourself in Contempt!*
Jonny D: * Blah, did you order the Code Red?*
Mhykke: You *don’t* have to answer that question!
Blahish: I'll answer the question!
[to Jonny D ]
Blahish: You want answers?
JonnyD: I think I'm entitled.
Blahish: *You want answers?*
JonnyD: *I want the truth!*
Blahish: *You can’t handle the truth!*
[pauses]
Blahish: Son, we live in a guild that doesEpic Raids , and those Raids have to be filled by men with Epic Sword of Shadows. Whose gonna do it? You? You, JonnyD? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Totmacher, and you curse the Pwnies. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That ToT's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about in raid parties, you want me on that raid, you need me on that raid. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very completion that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way piking, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a **** what you think you are entitled to.
JonnyD: Did you order the Code Red?
Blahish: I did the job I...
JonnyD: *Did you order the Code Red?*
Blahish: *You’re MadGoddamned right I did!*

[Schwarzie]

-1 Rep! Not enuff me in it.

Of course not, noone wants Monks in a good story.

[Milamber69]

Always happy to see tempshot roopants make an appearance.

[toughguyjoe]

Always happy to see tempshot roopants make an appearance.

And Oscar worthy performance.

[LazarusPossum]

Something tells me he'll be back.