Just curious

[soloman]

The other day was hanging round BS ing with my brother in /tells and I saw a Cruicible LFM pop up. I was on with my 11th level barbarian Ghrunt and my brother was on with his rogue Dijenerit. We both decided try to join and gobble up some xp. When I clicked to join, there was no one yet in the group and yet I wasnt accepted so I figured the party leader was probably afk. I went and restocked my pots and vendored some junk and then took a look at the LFM again. There was now 4 people in the group and neither me nor my brother had been accepted in to the group. I looked at the "Who" list to see who this fella was and he was from one of the elite guilds. So then I figured that most likely the guy had a few guildies jump the LFM. I then looked up the names of the party members that had joined the group and none of them were from the party leaders guild. Once the group filled without a response from the party leader as to why I wasnt accepted, I decided Id just run myself. At the time it kinda p***** me off but I shrugged it off and me and my brother grabbed a friend and a hireling and 3.5 manned it long before the other fella was finished with his run. I am not popping out a boohoo! post about not getting accepted, let me make that as clear as I can. I am just curious as to why the guy didnt want me in his party. If he doesnt like people from my guild thats no big deal, just let me know and we can stay out of each others way. I do however find it hard to believe anyone could have much of an issue with us because we dont play often enough to make alot of friends let alone enemies. If you can respond to me "Sir party Leader" by PM or in game, I would be very thankful and If this is all just a misunderstanding then let me appologize ahead of time. Peace!

Valintino/Snyper/Solobot/Medie/Miagi/Totemm/Tahnke/Claymorr/Ghrunt all of "Drums of War"

[Ministry]

...I am just curious as to why the guy didnt want me in his party. If he doesnt like people from my guild thats no big deal, just let me know and we can stay out of each others way. I do however find it hard to believe anyone could have much of an issue with us because we dont play often enough to make alot of friends let alone enemies. If you can respond to me "Sir party Leader" by PM or in game, I would be very thankful and If this is all just a misunderstanding then let me appologize ahead of time. Peace!

Valintino/Snyper/Solobot/Medie/Miagi/Totemm/Tahnke/Claymorr/Ghrunt all of "Drums of War"

I'm guessing this is one of 3 possibilities...

1 - Was waiting for someone or someones to join that they felt more comfortable teaming with... perhaps people from what they would perceive as other top guilds.

2 - Knew you and / or your guild and didn't like what they knew and didn't want to get into it with you

3 - Didn't know the quest well and suspected that someone they didn't know or from a guild that is not so reknown wouldn't either.


Here's what's happening out there.

If I (standing in for the team leader) respond and tell you the truth, you (anyone looking to join an LFM that is not accepted) will more than likely be ****ed.

Very few people are okay to hear that the person doesn't think highly of them or their guild.

I had an example of this a few months ago when I was making a raid. I had a guy hit the raid that I'm neutral with... or was up till that point. Then a person from guild I don't care for hits my LFM. I send him a very nice tell that I'm not teaming with people from that guild, because of some past experiences that weren't very good. He sends a tell back and says okay... np. That was it. I thought that was cool and he seemed to as well. Out of no where, the ****** on the team starts blabbling about that not being cool and blah, blah, blah... I couldn't really understand what he was saying, and then he dropped. I was like... "on my list for being stupid".


I agree with you. If you don't like me or my guild or feel you don't think I'm the right person for your party... just say something and let me go on my way. I would rather know than not.


But at the same time, when I'm filling a raid, I take my time. Just because someone is the first person to hit my LFM, doesn't mean I'm going to accept them. I'm looking for a good solid team of people and / or guilds that I know are good and after I have enough solid players... approximately half the team, I then open it up to whomever. Well, this one time in band camp... haha... some guy and his guildy that I don't know hits my LFM. I don't accept. Then I start filling my team. About 1/2 way through he sends me a tell asking why I'm not accepting him. At the time I'm in the middle of tell hell with people wanting to join the raid, switching to other toons, etc... so I really don't have time to answer him. Then he sends me another tell that Legion will never be welcome on his guilds runs. I finally respond with... hahaha... oh.. okay. In the end, this ******s guild has piled on Legion runs since, so his words as usual from people like that mean very very little to me.


I don't know how many teams / raids you form in a day, but it's not always the most fun thing to do. You are dealing with all these people hitting your raids (well... I'm sorry, but I do get a lot) and people sending you tells all over the place. Honestly, it's not fun. But, I take some pride in making teams that I know will succeed and for those who have been on my runs, can attest to a very very low failure rate... less than 3% would be about right.


Do we need to respond to everyone and / or decline them when they hit our LFM's?

I don't think so.

If you have time, great... but I'm usually multi multi tasking at that point. I do respond if I have time. I have been known to respond to up to 10 people at a time when hitting my raids. I just copy my tell to one and send to the others... something generic but true. Most people are happy to hear something back, even if it is what I tell them...

"Trying to sort out the team and respond to my friends tells... I am accepting people through the LFM and tells and if there are any spots free when I'm done, I will accept. I should know shortly." Something like that.

In the end, they have a choice to hang in and wait or go off and do something else.


Should we respond with something and / or the truth?

Hard to say.

I don't want to be considered some kind of ****** for telling people the truth according to the way I see it.

Just because I don't know you or your guild doesn't mean you are a poor player, it just means at this moment I don't want to chance taking an unknown. I do take unknowns now and then, but it is rare that the unknown will be in a very pivotal postion.. like the only arcane on a shroud.


In the end, people don't respond because they don't want to tell you what they are really thinking and / or they are busy and / or they don't want to be thought of an ****** for telling you the truth.... according to them.

IMO

[soloman]

I know that my guild is not well known. Drums of War consists of mostly all family members and we do not raid very often. However, we play hard and as smart as we can and I can only hope that those who have grouped with us, has recognized that. But you must agree Min that a 6-man group and a Raid party are different animals. Too often in this game I have noticed that certain players look at the folks around them as though they are all NPCs and not real people. I have been turned down by many many parties in my time on this game most of them by Raid groups. I can truely understand that and have no quarrel with those who have turned me down. By not responding in any way to a persons request to join, I think that it is a serious show of disrespect to the player from the party leader. Never have I not responded to someones request to join any group I have ever started. And this will always be so. The way this situation came across to me was that the party leader, in particular, didnt want me (or anyone in my guild) in his group not because he thought we were incappable of contributing to the party. As I said before I may be wrong in my assesment of the party leaders mindset and if that is so then I am truely sorry for my role in the misunderstanding.........Just curious i suppose


Valintino/Snyper/Claymorr/Medie/Miagi/Totemm/Tahnke/Solobot/Ghrunt all of Thelanis

[bartcom2000]

I know that my guild is not well known. Drums of War consists of mostly all family members and we do not raid very often. However, we play hard and as smart as we can and I can only hope that those who have grouped with us, has recognized that. But you must agree Min that a 6-man group and a Raid party are different animals. Too often in this game I have noticed that certain players look at the folks around them as though they are all NPCs and not real people. I have been turned done by many many parties in my time on this game most of them by Raid groups. I can truely understand that and have no quarrel with those who have turned me down. By not responding in any way to a persons request to join, I think that it is a serious show of disrespect to the player from the party leader. Never have I not responded to someones request to join any group I have ever started. And this will always be so. The way this situation came across to me was that the party leader, in particular, didnt want me (or anyone in my guild) in his group, not because he thought we were incappable of contributing to the party. As I said before I may be wrong in my assesment of the party leaders mindset, and if that is so then I am truely sorry for my role in the misunderstanding.........Just curious i suppose


Valintino/Snyper/Claymorr/Medie/Miagi/Totemm/Tahnke/Solobot/Ghrunt all of Thelanis

dude, don't sweat the smalltards outhtere, i'd gladly accept you into any raid i'm in..

[gizmos199]

sol i think you might take things a littel to personal . .......
i use to . if i wasnt alowed in a group i took there names , and w8ted . i had booted like 10 -15 ppl out of my shrouds after they buffed ppl , while they where geting mana . it wasn't right . but it made me laugh. all becuse they didnt wanna take my rogue on there tor run . point is TRY not to let it get to u . and if it dose remember them . glad to see ya still kickin . ROC .

[Ministry]

... But you must agree Min that a 6-man group and a Raid party are different animals. Too often in this game I have noticed that certain players look at the folks around them as though they are all NPCs and not real people...

Valintino/Snyper/Claymorr/Medie/Miagi/Totemm/Tahnke/Solobot/Ghrunt all of Thelanis

On these 2 points I do agree, the first one to a great extent and the 2nd one to a lesser extent.

Yes, any decent to top player can drag any group of a couple or a full team through any 6 person quest. My guess again would be that the team leader was not a decent to top player, or really didn't want to suffer anyone he thought was a "pugger" that may not have the basic gear, competencies, etc.

You have to know what I know now. I have seen too many level 16 players that barely have knowledge of the game and / or quest and don't carry healing pots or the basic weapons required for some of the upper end 6 person quests.

Herein lies why people have become reluctant to take "puggers" / anyone they don't recognize and / or are in a guild that is not of great reknown.

Heck, I've done this. We have a team that I'm not the leader of and we have an LFM. 3 players hit and we have 1 spot. One player is from a guild I know very little about and what I do know is not positive. The second player is unguilded. The final player is from Inferus Sus. Upon the team leader telling me this... its a no brainer, you take the Inferus Sus player. One of the players in the queue sends a tell to the team leader all ****ed off, I get involved and instantly make a new enemy. We move through the quest, the Inferus Sus player rocks and we complete like nothing. Hell, if the IS person didn't get accepted, they wouldn't have said a thing and would have looked for a new team. If we did accept the ****** that got upset, it would have most likely been a horrible run with them either being useless or annoying (I found out much more about that person afterwards and was right about them).

The part about us treating players we don't know like NPC's is pretty accurate in a lot of cases and is sad. I know I've done the same. I go into a quest as the team leader and pretty much dominate it, telling people where we are going and what we are going to do and see... etc... and if someone can't follow my basic instructions, I get a little miffed. Many times I will say, if someone knows something I don't know or has any questions, please ask, but it also depends on my time frame. When I'm on a team that I'm not leading, I go in and do my part, but if I see people jeopardizing the mission or the team leader out of their element or making stupid decisions, I will quickly step up and take over or solo the quest to ensure completion and then drop.

Life imitates game. In RL we all have our friends and preferred alliances. This is the same in game. In RL we see people outside of our circle and maybe we smile, most likely we don't and if they need help or want to join our circle, we can be very resistant.

Is this wrong?

Up to us to decide on our own.

I'll tell you this though, if I acted like that all the time, I would have missed out on meeting and running with so many fine players. I find my gaming time so much richer because I have taken the time to pug. I have made so many more friends in game and I'm welcome in probably about 90% of all the guild runs out there.

When I post an LFM, I have to send out more apologies for being full to fast than I do have to send tells to get people for the run.

So, in spite of being far from perfect, my way of dealing with people in RL and the game seems to work.

I'm sure every once in a while someone is not going to get onto my runs because I would prefer to fill with people I already know and they are not going to like me for that, but in the end, I can't make everyone happy and ultimately just want to enjoy myself.

The guy who didn't accept you probably thought that he would be better off waiting for people and / or people from guilds that he was more familiar with.

Should he sent you a tell to explain that thought?

I guess good manners says yes, but in the end, it's his team, he's leading, he put up the LFM, so really... I don't believe he needs to explain himself. Sorry, but that is IMO.

[SniptheShadow]

Rule #1 - Don't sweat the small stuff.

Rule #2 - Everything is small stuff.

That reads back like a cliche, but it is so very true.

There is an odd juxtiposition to online gaming with faceless strangers. It sets up the foundation for a tense mental state with every blind interaction.

On the one hand you have you, the happy and eager gamer. You log on with a feeling of excitement. You are ready to play, explore, view great visuals, and maybe loot awesome treasure. Pixilated..but still. You are saturated in a childlike glee.

On the other hand you have the faceless strangers, in this case the ones with lfm's up. Since you can's see them face to face and they can't see you either, it adds a level of defensiveness from you (or I), and of rudeness from them to any inteaction, even if said person was not really rude.

It happens constantly. Haven't you ever received an email back and at first thought you were being insulted when the sender just wording things sloppily and you misunderstood their point? It works like that here too.

Since we are in a mindset ready for play and want to join others on the virtual playground, it feels rotten to get snubbed and refused. Just take your ball and go play with other kids. It's a big playground.

On a personal note, I go in waves with this problem.

I'm a casual gamer because my RL gets in the way. I still want to learn. I still want to run with the big boys (or girls) as it were, but it's nerve-wracking at times. My main is a 28 point build pure rogue with low Con and paper AC. That right there sets things up against me at times. I have good gear (thank god) but it has taken me 14 months to get my guy to lvl 16. So I know what it means to get snubbed. There is a very big split in peoples' views on rogues running in the Shroud. Some love em, some hate em. And I can't even count the times my /tells were ignored just trying to join.

Do I get mad? Sure.

Do I care? eh...for about two minutes...maybe three.

I try to see it for what it is and shake it off. But I do sympathize with you.

I don't know if all my rambling helped. I just felt the urge to try.

I hope I did just a little.

But nah, don't worry about an interaction like that.

Just play.

Have fun.

In spite of a guy like that...

Snip

[Uproar]

Same craps been happening to me a lot lately too. I think there is a new found wave of guild worship going on at the moment. Some folks may not like to run with one or two of my characters that are still weak, but the majority of my characters are every bit as capable as the best of them. I still get the odd no thanks we don't need your class, followed by dropped from request queue, only to find them listing my class again two minutes later.

Oh well... mostly their loss.

I am really amazed at how many PUG's lately are after the absolute perfect party mix (or think they are anyways). A group is a group generally speaking it can be completed. Good group Leadership is far, far, far more important then the perfect class mix. Most of the dungeon crawls I am on that fail, fail primarily due to poor leadership (followed by the occasional fool that just won't listen no matter how good the leader).

[Ministry]

... Good Group Leadership Is Far, Far, Far More Important Then The Perfect Class Mix. Most Of The Dungeon Crawls I Am On That Fail, Fail Primarily Due To Poor Leadership (followed By The Occasional Fool That Just Won't Listen No Matter How Good The Leader).

Qft!

But, with the fool, I just finish the raid or quest in spite of them and then tell everyone I know to avoid them. I actually avoided a whole guild for months because of one tard and still won't let them on my runs because I don't want to chance getting that tard and I've told members of that guild that.



As far as guild worship... it's valid.

I know my chances of getting a better player are when they are in one of the top guilds that I know of, vs. a lesser known guild and most assuredly an unguilded player.

When I see unguilded, I either think they are too poor of a player to get into a good guild or they are not very sociable, either way... I avoid them like the plague. The only time I will add them, is if my run doesn't fill up as fast as usual, or we have a very solid core and I don't mind taking some risks that won't jeopardize the group and maybe, just maybe, could provide a benefit.... unlikely... but every once in a while I'm surprised, thus why I do it every once in a while. Unfortunately I've had more bad experiences with those than good, which leads me to doing that less and less every day and sticking with Legion, allied guilds and / or friends.

[soloman]

Min, I think perhaps you are mistaking the intent of my post or perhaps I havent explained myself very well. The latter probably being the likely culprit. The way the entire situation cam across to me was that it WAS personal, not just the average issues any pugger comes across when he tries to join a group. I have been asked to leave groups because the leader wanted to bring in guildies for the final part of a quest chain so that they could farm it and I never complained. I just thanked them for the group and went on my way. I have no issues with someone trying to make a team that he believes would be more sucsessful or wanting to run with someone that he or other group members are friends with. This post was not about the party leader declining to take me or my brother into his group, it is about his failure to respond at all and the seemingly personal nature of that lack of a response. I've been married to my second wife for 8 years so I am used to rejection, if he would have turned me down and or sent me a tell like "Sorry dude got a buddy coming" or even "Hey im gonna fill with peeps im more familiar with" ,this post would've never been written. I was just curious as to whether this person has a problem with me and/or my guild. If that is the case then so be it, it is just nice to know who your enemies are.

My time in boots taught me alot about leadership and accountability. The person with the star by his name is responsible for the success or failure of the group. No one can fault someone trying to be a good leader and provide the best team he can to ensure success. But S*** does roll uphill as far as I am concerned and Real leaders should recognize the accountability side to his role.

Thanks alot for your thoughts on this issue Ministry.

[Grimgore]

Not trolling (honestly) but I have had this happen on my server as well. I am unsure why people cannot just respond to requests to join parties. I saw an LFM for Gwlan's Elite last evening and all classes were highlighted. I figured my rogue would be welcomed but as soon as I tried to join, the LFM when dark on my screen and the rogue option was gone. I sent the leader a tell and he told me that he did not want "competition" for traps as he was a 6 ranger, 2 monk, 1 rogue that could handle all the traps himself.

I told him I was a Thief-Acrobat build that was heavy on the fight and less on the traps. He invited me, blew almost every trap he tried to set disarm, and I had the most kills (over the barb and a fighter) in the session. He later told me that he should have just let me do the traps in the first place. He apologized (in group) and said that he was glad that I sent him a tell rather than just being blown off.

I'll go back to my server now.

-Grim

[juniorpfactors]

On these 2 points I do agree, the first one to a great extent and the 2nd one to a lesser extent.

Yes, any decent to top player can drag any group of a couple or a full team through any 6 person quest. My guess again would be that the team leader was not a decent to top player, or really didn't want to suffer anyone he thought was a "pugger" that may not have the basic gear, competencies, etc.

You have to know what I know now. I have seen too many level 16 players that barely have knowledge of the game and / or quest and don't carry healing pots or the basic weapons required for some of the upper end 6 person quests.

Herein lies why people have become reluctant to take "puggers" / anyone they don't recognize and / or are in a guild that is not of great reknown.

Heck, I've done this. We have a team that I'm not the leader of and we have an LFM. 3 players hit and we have 1 spot. One player is from a guild I know very little about and what I do know is not positive. The second player is unguilded. The final player is from Inferus Sus. Upon the team leader telling me this... its a no brainer, you take the Inferus Sus player. One of the players in the queue sends a tell to the team leader all ****ed off, I get involved and instantly make a new enemy. We move through the quest, the Inferus Sus player rocks and we complete like nothing. Hell, if the IS person didn't get accepted, they wouldn't have said a thing and would have looked for a new team. If we did accept the ****** that got upset, it would have most likely been a horrible run with them either being useless or annoying (I found out much more about that person afterwards and was right about them).

The part about us treating players we don't know like NPC's is pretty accurate in a lot of cases and is sad. I know I've done the same. I go into a quest as the team leader and pretty much dominate it, telling people where we are going and what we are going to do and see... etc... and if someone can't follow my basic instructions, I get a little miffed. Many times I will say, if someone knows something I don't know or has any questions, please ask, but it also depends on my time frame. When I'm on a team that I'm not leading, I go in and do my part, but if I see people jeopardizing the mission or the team leader out of their element or making stupid decisions, I will quickly step up and take over or solo the quest to ensure completion and then drop.

Life imitates game. In RL we all have our friends and preferred alliances. This is the same in game. In RL we see people outside of our circle and maybe we smile, most likely we don't and if they need help or want to join our circle, we can be very resistant.

Is this wrong?

Up to us to decide on our own.

I'll tell you this though, if I acted like that all the time, I would have missed out on meeting and running with so many fine players. I find my gaming time so much richer because I have taken the time to pug. I have made so many more friends in game and I'm welcome in probably about 90% of all the guild runs out there.

When I post an LFM, I have to send out more apologies for being full to fast than I do have to send tells to get people for the run.

So, in spite of being far from perfect, my way of dealing with people in RL and the game seems to work.

I'm sure every once in a while someone is not going to get onto my runs because I would prefer to fill with people I already know and they are not going to like me for that, but in the end, I can't make everyone happy and ultimately just want to enjoy myself.

The guy who didn't accept you probably thought that he would be better off waiting for people and / or people from guilds that he was more familiar with.

Should he sent you a tell to explain that thought?

I guess good manners says yes, but in the end, it's his team, he's leading, he put up the LFM, so really... I don't believe he needs to explain himself. Sorry, but that is IMO.

ministry you lost me after the 1st line, what a black page, I am sure he appreciates your feedback, but how bored are you at this point, writting novels to a dude that lost out on a noob run, it happens to noobs all the time, you are too nice

jrp

[Ministry]

... I was just curious as to whether this person has a problem with me and/or my guild. If that is the case then so be it, it is just nice to know who your enemies are...

No worries bro, I did understand and if you read my responses through my eyes... they made sense... ******!!

haha

Like I said, most people don't want to tell you the truth.

They would rather be ignorant and not tell you then be considered an enemy or a jackass.

I agree... better to know what people are thinking of you so you may either... Hate them, Change to make yourself more suitable to your environment, or Just say... Meh... and move on with the knowledge in hand.

But in the end, why would they take 10 seconds to tell you, when they can much more easilly just ignore you.

You see this in society all the time when people ask you for change or help.

My wife lost her job, but we still donate to the food bank, a child in a 3rd world country and the girls hockey team looking for bottles on their weekend bottle drive.

It's so much easier to ignore people than help.

Hell, if I didnt' help people I would have way more cash in RL and way more Plat in game.

But in the end.... I have a small hope that maybe if I do the best I can and help people in the Real World and in Stormreach, I may end up avoiding Shavarrath for real, and somewhere someone along the way may help someone else in need. You never know.

[Ministry]

ministry you lost me after the 1st line, what a black page, I am sure he appreciates your feedback, but how bored are you at this point, writting novels to a dude that lost out on a noob run, it happens to noobs all the time, you are too nice

jrp

I'm at work ******... what else am I suppose to do.

[tihocan]

I hate it as well when for whatever reason a leader ignores my join request. I'm here sitting and waiting to hear from him/her, and just wasting my time.
The minimum respect I'm asking for is at least to hit the decline button if you don't want me. I appreciate an explanation as well, but it's not what matters most, there are plenty of (good or bad) reasons to decline someone, and it's ok if you don't want to explain. But hit the **** button!

[SpanishBlueEyes]

*hugs* i just like hugging people before i start as i have played with alot of ya'll and have had great times with the ones i have played with. Here is my lil tidbit. I don't form groups very often because i am not skilled enough to lead everyone and guide them to a great end, but when i have put a rare LFM for quests i do know sometimes i get caught up in explaining stuff to some newer people and even some vets on the game plan for the quest or quests. I also sometimes forget to send tells to the people who have requested a tell back saying why i am not excepting them. I had something happen the other day while i was in a shroud. I was not the leader but we had a lvl 12 clr want to join our group to be our 2nd clr. I was on my bard and i knew if the clr didn't pan out i was going to have to pick up the slack for him or her. I did ask what guild they were in and that my vote was for no for the lvl 12 clr. My reasons were this....

1. I would have to know the person trying to take on this daughting task in order to let them come in 4 lvl's lower than the rest of the group.
2. Guild is not important all the time *because i don't knock any guild personally* but if he/she was part of one of the elite guilds it was not only a good chance i knew them but then i could say yeah they have the right stuff to fill the job.

Now that might seem very unfair but those are my honest reasons for some of my votes or thoughts on some grouping choices. Now i have had your same experiences clay as some people probly don't like my playing style or didn't like someone in my guild at one time. If they want to miss out on my action then their lost is what i say. I give everyone a fair chance when it comes to this game because i know i am not perfect and probly are very annoying to alot of the community, but i always remember to treat everyone no matter how rude or annoying they are to me i treat them the way i wanted to be treated. Oh and i just wanted to say this......


I LOVE DRUMS OF WAR! So there is my peace. I just wanted to bring a cheerie side to this discussion.

*edit* i never heard if the clr was in a guild or not so i only assumed that he or she was unguilded.

[Thrudh]

I hate it as well when for whatever reason a leader ignores my join request. I'm here sitting and waiting to hear from him/her, and just wasting my time.
The minimum respect I'm asking for is at least to hit the decline button if you don't want me. I appreciate an explanation as well, but it's not what matters most, there are plenty of (good or bad) reasons to decline someone, and it's ok if you don't want to explain. But hit the **** button!

Yeah I really hate that too...

I have 6 capped characters (almost 7), and lots of times there are multiple groups I can join...

For example - My wizard wants to do Shroud for his 20th run, so that's my first choice... I see a Shroud run up that already has one caster but the LFM still shows all classes, so I hit Join... no response for a minute... I also see there's a Hound run up that my barbarian could use...

I send a tell saying... "Need another caster? I sent a join request... I got all the goods".... Still no response... Now I really want to do the Shroud run... but I'm pefectly okay with the Hound run. Just hit decline if you don't want me...

Don't leave me waiting... Finally the group fills up, I get the auto-decline message, but the Hound group no longer needs DPS and is now just looking for clerics...

<sigh>

Just a little common courtesy, please...

[Ministry]

Okay, for all the people who posted here that they would like to be declined instead of waiting in queue.

Have you ever been declined?

I was declined once and booted once and both came in the last little while.

It's not a great feeling

I've sat in queue before and have had the message that it filled and I got the auto-decline message.

I prefer that.

Honestly, I prefer to hit an LFM, and if I'm not picked up in a minute or less, I look for another group, make my own or switch to another toon.

For you guys and gals wanting to get your wizard into a shroud, that use to be a problem as most people would take sorcs over wizzys, and still do for the most part.

However, rep can help you a bit. I solo the arcane duties on my wizzy in raids and have outkilled 9 out of 10 sorcs I've competed against in the shroud, including Legion sorcs.

I still honestly think it has more to do with your rep and your guild in getting accepted onto teams.

Maybe Drums of War is a good guild, but I don't think I've teamed with any, so I can't tell you.

But, I know Maelstrom, Storm Lords, Infamous Flying Vagabonds, Giant Slayers Inc., Bane, DWAT, Attacks the Darkness, Ground, etc... and know that if I see their players him my LFM, I accept... simple.

Other guilds and unguilded players and just let them wait or send them tells that I'm waiting on friends or guildies for a minute or so first and if they want a spot if there is one free after that, then great, but if they don't, I can decline them now.

I think that works well.

However... NO ONE WILL EVER BE HAPPY WITH WHAT YOU DO!!!!

I could nicely send them a tell like I just posted above and have them fire back with F YOU SOB... I don't need your pity?

So... again...

You want the leader to decline you... great.

But... if we do that to someone else, they will get ****ed and will want to blacklist you and / or your whole guild.

I really don't see a win win in this debate at all.

People don't like to not get accepted and / or get declined and will not react well to it no matter what you do.

To be honest, most of the people I send my defacto standard tell to, seem to be pretty good about it and most wish me a good run.

But, every once in a while you get a guild... maybe one (I can tell you who they are in game if you pm me) that gets all ****y because you don't know them and don't respond or don't accept them.

Seriously... I don't know your guild and I have people from DWAT, IFV and GSI trying to join. WHO WOULD YOU ACCEPT???

I feel bad sometimes for these people, but let me tell you this...

When I first started the game, no one really wanted me on their teams and guild. Immediately in the game guilds were formed with friends and I was the odd guy out. I fumbled around on Xoriat for a while before finally running with the X guild. By then... about 3 months playing the game, my skills were decent enough and they brought me into their guild. Over time I outgrew that situation and moved on and on once more into Legion.

It took time. You have to prove your name and / or your guild to get almost universal acceptance. Now don't get me wrong, I'm very far off from being accepted universally by all the guilds.... ahhaa... FAR FROM IT... but... I'm sure better off 3 years later, than I was when I first started.

If you are going to run mostly with your guild and keep unknown for the most part on the server, well... thats the way it's going to be for you.

I don't think that's going to change.

In the end, we will never have consensus, but I will try to respond more often to my requests for joining and will try to come up with the perfect message. I know most will be okay, but I will have to deal with some people who don't like it. I know I would be better off just ignoring them, but it seems like the majority of the people out here want to hear something, even if it is not what they want to hear.

Maybe if we all do this, people may catch on.

Ya never know.

[soloman]

ministry you lost me after the 1st line, what a black page, I am sure he appreciates your feedback, but how bored are you at this point, writting novels to a dude that lost out on a noob run, it happens to noobs all the time, you are too nice

jrp

It happens to both those who are new and to those who have drank their cup of coffee in Stormreach. I heard that it even happens to those who have more of a forum reputation than in game.

Peace!

[Ministry]

It happens to both those who are new and to those who have drank their cup of coffee in Stormreach. I heard that it even happens to those who have more of a forum reputation than in game.

Peace!

**** good point.

Funny but true. People have told me that I have not always come off so well on the forums and then they team with me and have a fair bit better impression.

Well, not always.