making PMs public

[Quanefel]

Arguably the same reason someone would actively seek to keep their characters unknown. Right, PS?

In my opinion, if you're not willing to face the consequences of what you say, you probably shouldn't be saying it.

Or the situation was already handled so there is no need to continue with it. If you trust someone who openly wants to discuss private matters, when will it be you that it is done too?

[Aussieee]

Do not post in public but do send to everyone interested to see in private

So what you say lets start a line and see who interested in receiving a PM with said contest.

I am first one in line toss it my way!!!!

That was Q will be happy with staying in private and we will be even more happy to see his other face

[Strakeln]

Or the situation was already handled so there is no need to continue with it. If you trust someone who openly wants to discuss private matters, when will it be you that it is done too?

Presumably, the second I send a PM that ticks someone off. That said, I stand behind everything I say or type. There's only two reasons I can think of that I send PMs instead of posting:

1) What I have to say breaks forum rules, or
2) What I have to say is way off topic

I'm a strong believer in standing behind what I say, this goes doubly so for anything I write (since written words always come back to haunt)... I expect to be judged by my actions.

This is even more of a prevalent issue for me, as what I say impacts my rep as well as Qwijy's. While I run QwijyMart as a separate entity from Strakeln (meaning, I don't bring my disagreements to "work" with me - I sell to people I don't like, etc), anything I say or do will directly impact QwijyMart, since almost everyone knows that I'm The Qwij.

All of that said, I think this entire discussion is moot. PMs can be shared as much as one would like... they just can't be reposted on the forums without permission. So regardless of the current rules, one should still understand that PMs are anything but 'P'.

[Ann_Shadow]

If that is a forum rule, then you should abide by it. I don't think I have ever even looked at my PMs. Don't even know how and don't care to see it.

I figure people send them as a way to say things they don't want to be held accountable for.

[Rabbi_Hordo]

Excuses, excuses.


There is such a thing as honor among men. Private is private.

Your previous postings have proven beyond any shadow of a doubt that your grasp of honor and humanity is fleeting at best.

Integrity is all we have to countenance ourselves by and without that such concepts of honor and humanity and privacy are inconceivable. If you have something to say that is pertinent to a discussion, then say it. That someone outed you as a PMer is not dishonorable since they were asking your permission to post it. You, knowing you would be caught in a philosophical quagmire, declined. Fine. I for one champion honesty above all else and say posting should be ok. That it is not is the current rule. Fine, and I will abide, but I will not remain silent if I get one I will ask permission to post openly as I am NOT dishonest to begin with as it seems you are intending to be with your tenebrous and tangential thought-processes.

[Yajerman01]

Private message means just that, private. Sure some people hide behind the fig leaf using that protection to further disrupt or garner an argument. The thing is Sugar, better people handle situations with poise tact and understanding.

However, two things can be accomplished within the guidlines - as Strak mentioned, there is nothing saying you cant forward the email to others and there is nothing stating you cant "paraphrase" the statement.

aside that /not signed - i like my privacy; however if I choose to pore my guts out on someone knowing they could dissiminate that message elswhere then im a fool.

Private message can also be used tactfully in extracting information as well.

[Mithran]

I'm with Strakeln on this one, but I could count the number of Private Messages I've sent on one hand, and they're exclusively restricted to responses to PM's.

[Emili]

Private message means just that, private. Sure some people hide behind the fig leaf using that protection to further disrupt or garner an argument. The thing is Sugar, better people handle situations with poise tact and understanding.

However, two things can be accomplished within the guidlines - as Strak mentioned, there is nothing saying you cant forward the email to others and there is nothing stating you cant "paraphrase" the statement.

aside that /not signed - i like my privacy; however if I choose to pore my guts out on someone knowing they could dissiminate that message elswhere then im a fool.

Private message can also be used tactfully in extracting information as well.

While we like to presume what we present behind closed doors in confidence remain behind the door hidden from view. The penchant and content of what we convey to those we endow with this knowledge now also becomes their burden.

There are no black nor white not one course to reach a destination. We make our own peace we carry our own burdens and when we share those burdens with others we are indeed bestowing the fact we intend to share the burden. 'T is no longer really a secret. To force upon someone else the weight between right and wrong under the guise of trust is actually a selfish thing. Like the priest in the confessional you may have presume you've made your peace, however the priest must now seek his with god as he is bound by truth to help those souls to repent. “Forgive me father for I had lied..... “ Obviously your penance may require you seek gods help through prayer ... yet it also – and many do not think about this – entails you disclose and rectify this sin with those you have lied to.

Thus, the burden of revealing all that is said in confidence, although weighted upon us... may not be ours to share. However the tactical thing to do is to push the weight back on the individuals conscience and advise they pursue a correct course of action.

As with all trust is a grey area... one may trust in an individual but overall that person must come to their own conclusion on what is wrong and what is right... Loose lips sink ships – 'tis true – but throughout the course of history one may find many examples where sinking that ship was the just and honorable thing to do. The advise I have for those so burdened is to appeal to those who entrusted them to come clean and sink that ship.

Emi

[Quanefel]

Your previous postings have proven beyond any shadow of a doubt that your grasp of honor and humanity is fleeting at best.

Integrity is all we have to countenance ourselves by and without that such concepts of honor and humanity and privacy are inconceivable. If you have something to say that is pertinent to a discussion, then say it. That someone outed you as a PMer is not dishonorable since they were asking your permission to post it. You, knowing you would be caught in a philosophical quagmire, declined. Fine. I for one champion honesty above all else and say posting should be ok. That it is not is the current rule. Fine, and I will abide, but I will not remain silent if I get one I will ask permission to post openly as I am NOT dishonest to begin with as it seems you are intending to be with your tenebrous and tangential thought-processes.

Your words here might have more meaning if you have not shown disrepect not just to me but others with your brown-shirt comments and worse. The comments were uncalled for.

[Aussieee]

Your words here might have more meaning if you have not shown disrepect not just to me but others with your brown-shirt comments and worse. The comments were uncalled for.

Your words might have more meaning if you would stand behind what you say

[Emili]

Your words here might have more meaning if you have not shown disrepect not just to me but others with your brown-shirt comments and worse. The comments were uncalled for.

All words have meaning... 't is the nature of expression. It but a matter of opinion after all as to how we perceive their worth. What you see as invalid others may see as a valid viewpoint.

The one thing I know is that Hordo has never been less then honest with me, in his presentation, in his view he describes his feelings and thoughts. What you see as over-board I and most likely he might apologize for the wound... none the less how he worded it is his truth.

[Quanefel]

Your words might have more meaning if you would stand behind what you say

Done. Any PM I get will not be for public display or hinted at who might or might not have sent one. The word "private" in Private message has a meaning.

[Missing_Minds]

I say make em public. Hell, why would anyone be chicken excrement enough to send a message via PM that they wouldn't send in public?

For the most part, it is because they are too chicken to risk infractions.

[NXPlasmid]

Your words here might have more meaning if you have not shown disrepect not just to me but others with your brown-shirt comments and worse. The comments were uncalled for.

ROFLMAO It's the brown shirt diaries revealed! Where's Geraldo!

[Rabbi_Hordo]

Your words here might have more meaning if you have not shown disrepect not just to me but others with your brown-shirt comments and worse. The comments were uncalled for.

Accurate summations of biotry and the use of allusion are always called for. I stand by what I said and have been proven correct post after post.

[Quanefel]

Accurate summations of biotry and the use of allusion are always called for. I stand by what I said and have been proven correct post after post.

Adult guilds is not bigotry. The fact that many guilds do not allow children proves you incorrect. People have the right to enjoy the company of just adults, if they so desire.

[Rabbi_Hordo]

Adult guilds is not bigotry. The fact that many guilds do not allow children proves you incorrect. People have the right to enjoy the company of just adults, if they so desire.

Were that only what you had been advocating...that is just what you have double-talked yourself into after dozens of posts of your own painting yourself into a corner. Enjoy your solipsism.

[Emili]

Adult guilds is not bigotry. The fact that many guilds do not allow children proves you incorrect. People have the right to enjoy the company of just adults, if they so desire.

This "Adult guilds" has any bering on the question on hand in what way?

Actually Quanefel I feel badly about this whole situation. I feel badly for the position you've put my poor Sugar in. I feel badly for you as you attempt to dig your way out of unpopular opinion with all the stone throwing, name calling, ridicule and illusion entwined. Even for Khyber this drama is beyond what is a game... and spills over into reality.

I find it extremely hard and unpleasant to think of "Adult" in this equation. The word to me means "mature", "responsible", 'unselfish" and "empowered". This to me means one should set an example of what should be "right" not "wrong". It entails one admitting thier mistakes, setting the record straight and paying the amends.

[Quanefel]

Were that only what you had been advocating...that is just what you have double-talked yourself into after dozens of posts of your own painting yourself into a corner. Enjoy your solipsism.

I suppose in your mind it is ok to call on horrific images of WWII towards others you disagree with. To some, it would be showing utter lack of respect for opposing points of view. Even if it differs from your own.

Enjoy Godwin's law, you automatically lost the debate the moment that you used that type of hyperbole.

[Mazeratti]

Interestingly last night I watched the movie

"Elizabeth - The Golden Age"

For those that do not know, private letters were used and manipulated to have someone executed and made another bear the guilt of being tricked into doing such a thing.

Given, that is a trifle extreme for DDO Forums but it proves the point that even though its a private message it could be used in an way that is untrue anyway and out of context and edited.

Like the News, treat it all as BS and move on.