Feel free to decline...

[mobrien316]

If I hit your LFM and you don't want me to join for whatever reason, feel free to hit decline. I promise I won't be offended or blacklist you or scribble your name furiously into a notebook of people I will never group with again. I'll just move on - no big deal. A response ("accept" OR "decline") is just common courtesy.


If you are going AFK for an extended period of time, kindly pass the star so someone else can accept people.


If you wait twenty minutes, try to accept me, and find out I'm already in a group, please refrain from sending me nasty tells claiming I'm wasting your time by hitting your group when I'm already in a group.

Thank you.

:-)

[Bolo_Grubb]

+1 for agreement

[Derailment]

If you wait twenty minutes, try to accept me, and find out I'm already in a group, please refrain from sending me nasty tells claiming I'm wasting your time by hitting your group when I'm already in a group.


Admit it, you just clicked LFG, then started your quest and summoned a hireling.

[squishwizzy]

If I hit your LFM and you don't want me to join for whatever reason, feel free to hit decline. I promise I won't be offended or blacklist you or scribble your name furiously into a notebook of people I will never group with again. I'll just move on - no big deal. A response ("accept" OR "decline") is just common courtesy.


If you are going AFK for an extended period of time, kindly pass the star so someone else can accept people.


If you wait twenty minutes, try to accept me, and find out I'm already in a group, please refrain from sending me nasty tells claiming I'm wasting your time by hitting your group when I'm already in a group.

Thank you.

:-)

+1

Yeah, you're supposed to wait there in the wings until they need you, even if it takes a couple of hours. After all, that's what you logged in to do, right?

Another one of those little pet peeves is when they put an LFM up that's open to all classes, don't put anything in the comments, then decline you for not being a class that they need.

[Chai]

Its even more hilarious when they wait for 5-10 minutes, then accept you as the last person in the group. Like, lets see if I can find someone who looks better on paper, but Ima hold you in reserve in case I cant, in which case Ill accept you.

[IronClan]

Its even more hilarious when they wait for 5-10 minutes, then accept you as the last person in the group. Like, lets see if I can find someone who looks better on paper, but Ima hold you in reserve in case I cant, in which case Ill accept you.

That's usually just someone who AFK'ed...

Not that I've ever done that... or anything.

[Kawai]

hehe... +1 as well. your cup runneth over. :)

they feed their inner-child and wear their bigboy hat.

KNOW IT!
NO NOOBS!
HAVE EARS!
LISTEN!
BE RESPONSIVE!


...toobs.

[Nickademus42]

If I hit your LFM and you don't want me to join for whatever reason, feel free to hit decline. I promise I won't be offended or blacklist you or scribble your name furiously into a notebook of people I will never group with again. I'll just move on - no big deal.

You are a minority. I have never declined someone without receiving a nasty tell or a rude demand as to why.
.... wait, what server are you on....




Its even more hilarious when they wait for 5-10 minutes, then accept you as the last person in the group. Like, lets see if I can find someone who looks better on paper, but Ima hold you in reserve in case I cant, in which case Ill accept you.
That's usually just someone who AFK'ed...

I doubt it's someone afk. I've seen too many party leaders do this and they were NOT afk.

[SiliconScout]

You are a minority. I have never declined someone without receiving a nasty tell or a rude demand as to why.
.... wait, what server are you on....Gonna go out on a limb here and say it's probably the way you are doing it .. well unless you are on Cannith people there seem to be a little high strung. ;)

I have been declined with a quick tell explaining why (full group, just saved spot, even low HP) and it's never bothered me. Usually tell them good luck actually.


I doubt it's someone afk. I've seen too many party leaders do this and they were NOT afk.This I will agree with, but I have only seen it in Raids in my experience.


Another one of those little pet peeves is when they put an LFM up that's open to all classes, don't put anything in the comments, then decline you for not being a class that they need.Tell me about it, ticks me off to no end, especially when they tell you that they don't need any more X but the LFM stays up and the classes aren't adjusted.

Those people actually get a "friendly" little note in my list. Strike 1 for most.

[Antheal]

If you wait twenty minutes, try to accept me, and find out I'm already in a group, please refrain from sending me nasty tells claiming I'm wasting your time by hitting your group when I'm already in a group.

That alone deserves squelchification.

[Hordo]

After two minutes I usually send this /tell "Let my people go!" :D

[Jay203]

i still want the ability to withdraw my request to join...

[Enoach]

LFMs are tricky and people are unpredictable

Some avoid drama by just not doing anything, others just accept on a first come basis to avoid it.

Declining has several possible reasons and not everyone handles rejection well, yet many also don't handle rejection well either

I would point out that patience and understanding is needed on both sides.

As for being rude to another by being in a party at the time a I Viet is finally extended that is just bad form. It also reminds me of the call years ago to 're, over yourself from any pending lists when you do join a group.

[Lyria]

Gonna go out on a limb here and say it's probably the way you are doing it .. well unless you are on Cannith people there seem to be a little high strung. ;)


Hey now, I'm on Cannith and I'm mellow as heck. :)

I HAVE run into a couple fairly high-strung types though, so hm. My favorite one was when I was toodling around on my cleric at one point and looking to do some eveningstar epics, and saw a group forming to do them. So I clicked on join, got almost IMMEDIATELY declined, and the guy sent me a really nasty tell accusing me of having "joined and immediately left" earlier, and that he "didn't need some ****ing noob screwing up his groups".

Considering I'd only logged on like 5m before that, I sent him a rather puzzled tell asking what the hell he was smoking. He threw a couple more insults at me, so I told him he'd OBVIOUSLY mistaken me for someone with a similar name (not sure how, as Aliandyra is a pretty unique name, I think!), but to have a nice day anyway. I might have added "moron" or something afterwards, can't be sure. ;)

[Jay203]

Hey now, I'm on Cannith and I'm mellow as heck. :)

I HAVE run into a couple fairly high-strung types though, so hm. My favorite one was when I was toodling around on my cleric at one point and looking to do some eveningstar epics, and saw a group forming to do them. So I clicked on join, got almost IMMEDIATELY declined, and the guy sent me a really nasty tell accusing me of having "joined and immediately left" earlier, and that he "didn't need some ****ing noob screwing up his groups".

Considering I'd only logged on like 5m before that, I sent him a rather puzzled tell asking what the hell he was smoking. He threw a couple more insults at me, so I told him he'd OBVIOUSLY mistaken me for someone with a similar name (not sure how, as Aliandyra is a pretty unique name, I think!), but to have a nice day anyway. I might have added "moron" or something afterwards, can't be sure. ;)

mellow you say :p
you should so migrate to Khyber :D

[ThePurePanda]

id rather be declined rather than waiting for the "your request has been declined as x's party is full", when i join a group i instantly change my ED (depending on if its a hard quest i will go back to my main one) and head towards quest entrance normally seeing half the party already gathered there waiting for the group to fill. and i either get accepted and receive generic "sorry was AFK" (which im pretty sure 90% of time is BS) or receive message saying x's group is full which wastes a lot more of my time.

I would much rather be told im not the class they want, or they think im the worst healing and they want someone better because i let them die once when they zerged ahead of the party in the past and i didnt heal them. i wouldnt take it personally or as an insult as 1 its a freaking game, 2 meh i will join something else or go back to shard farming you just saved me 5minutes of jumping around waiting to see if i will be accepted or not and 3 its a freaking game!

[Arnhelm]

lol, I like it. +1 :)

[PNellesen]

You are a minority. I have never declined someone without receiving a nasty tell or a rude demand as to why.

A minority of at least 2 then - I have never taken it personally when I've been declined, and certainly have never asked for an explanation why.

(Disclaimer: I did take it personally once - the time I applied to a raid on my 19C/1F, the leader rejected me, then felt the need to send me a tell saying words to the effect of "Learn to read" and the LFM said something like "No morons"...)

[mobrien316]

A minority of at least 2 then - I have never taken it personally when I've been declined, and certainly have never asked for an explanation why.

(Disclaimer: I did take it personally once - the time I applied to a raid on my 19C/1F, the leader rejected me, then felt the need to send me a tell saying words to the effect of "Learn to read" and the LFM said something like "No morons"...)

I can't recall ever getting upset after being declined. It's a minor annoyance when there's no response whatsoever, and it's markedly more annoying when I get nasty tells (sometimes up to 30 minutes later) because the leader finally got around to accepting me, only to get the "cannot join your party because he is in a group" message.

I've been puzzled a few times, like when there is a raid posted, four people in the group, I hit the LFM and get declined a minute or two later. Then I see the LFM posted for another 45 minutes.

But, even in those cases or similar cases, I figure the leader is probably doing me a favor by not having me run with them. If he can't master the intricacies of the LFM panel it doesn't bode well for the quest.

[ThePrisoner]

lol, I like it. +1 :)

+1 for your +1.

[cidchronic]

hehe... +1 as well. your cup runneth over. :)

they feed their inner-child and wear their bigboy hat.

KNOW IT!
NO NOOBS!
HAVE EARS!
LISTEN!
BE RESPONSIVE!


...toobs.

my favorite is still...
No first timers, know the quest, TRs only, need guide

[Nickademus42]

Gonna go out on a limb here and say it's probably the way you are doing it...

I do it the same way everyone else does. I click the decline button.
I don't bother with sending an explanation, but even if I did I usually get their rude reply before I could type anything meaningful. Comments like "?" or "explain". It might have something to do with the fact I only decline/blacklist people for a bad attitude or causing drama in previous groups.


i still want the ability to withdraw my request to join...

THIS!

[Arius]

Trust me when I say I mean this in a sincere way, but why waste your time posting about someone that obviously has at least one personality disorder and/or mental illness? Personally I've grown quite numb to such encounters. Sometimes I think it's all from the same guy. Sadly, I know that's not true :(

[Aussir]

And some people keep asking me why I stopped PUG-ing a lone time ago...
I got tired of all the weirdos and, for the lack of a better word, "noobs" (not newbies) out there... :/

[AzB]

And some people keep asking me why I stopped PUG-ing a lone time ago...
I got tired of all the weirdos and, for the lack of a better word, "noobs" (not newbies) out there... :/

But that's real adventure! Boldly going forth into the unknown, poorly equipped to handle it. Now you've got the dungeon memorized to the point where you know exactly where to stand to avoid damage/get the sneak attack/whatever, and your gear is top notch... so where does the unknown come from?

PUGS!

Just accept the first 5 people that hit your LFM and go. That's real adventure!

And yes, if I decline people I have run with before I always send them a tell explaining the situation with a "sorry! next time!". And I usually get the same in return when I'm declined by familiar names. I think that's just common courtesy. But I don't care if someone I don't know declines me and doesn't send a reason. They don't owe me one, and I really don't even care.

But I agree it's very annoying to hit an LFM and get nothing for 10 minutes. No excuse, decline me if you don't want me. And if you have to go afk a lot, perhaps you shouldn't be leading a group. Just sayin'.

[Deathdefy]

Agreed on the withdraw request thing.

I often run weird splits (that apparently say "I am a noob" to noobs), such that I am declined or ignored for ages by more pugs than I'd care to admit.

I'm also picky about what pugs I'll apply to join though. I like maintaining an Elite Bravery Streak, I like not repeating quests with an epic version, and I like not doing quests higher than 2 below my CL until I hit 18.

Given those constraints, that I'm sure aren't unique to myself, I don't hit up too many pugs. When I do, if I'm not accepted reasonably quickly, I'll go solo something.

I loathe the awkwardness of being accepted when I'm like 7 minutes into a quest, say ~10 minutes after I've applied to a group.

The options of

a) making them reform even if they're not too annoyed about doing so,
b) completing my quest anyway and making them wait on me,
c) leaving my quest to join them immediately, or
d) a weird stand-off where they refuse to reform and I refuse to leave the dungeon

are all unpleasant.

[AzB]

I saw an LFM earlier that said have XXX hit points or don't join.

I think next time I see that, I'm going to pump up my hp with whatever possible (hit the dummy with vampiric weapon, rage, etc) right before I join. Then when the adventure starts, take off all my con and hp items. Just to see what happens.

The LFM didn't say anything about those hps being permanent, it just says to have them or don't join. ;)

[HackSlashKill]

Agreed on the withdraw request thing.

I often run weird splits (that apparently say "I am a noob" to noobs), such that I am declined or ignored for ages by more pugs than I'd care to admit.

I'm also picky about what pugs I'll apply to join though. I like maintaining an Elite Bravery Streak, I like not repeating quests with an epic version, and I like not doing quests higher than 2 below my CL until I hit 18.

Given those constraints, that I'm sure aren't unique to myself, I don't hit up too many pugs. When I do, if I'm not accepted reasonably quickly, I'll go solo something.

I loathe the awkwardness of being accepted when I'm like 7 minutes into a quest, say ~10 minutes after I've applied to a group.

The options of

a) making them reform even if they're not too annoyed about doing so,
b) completing my quest anyway and making them wait on me,
c) leaving my quest to join them immediately, or
d) a weird stand-off where they refuse to reform and I refuse to leave the dungeon

are all unpleasant.

Agreed on the withdraw for lfm

If I don't get accepted in first 1-2 minutes, I am off to the next squirrel, and sometimes, thats just plain old slayers or solo quest, and then suddenly, ten minutes later... you have joined group. Hmmm, what to do now? Cause I ain't leaving what I am doing

[silence383]

(Joke) You requested my group. When I am done cooking dinner, checking email, eating dinner, feeding my dog then letting my dog out to pee, waiting for him/her to come in and sitting back down and read all offers on the table I may consider you...lol ;)
Oh and a couple minutes to check your build on yourddo.com..so hey it takes a while lol... :) Kidding but its not always far from the truth these days.

If you cannot wait 20 minutes and decide to go play and have fun....
And no it was not my group you asked to join just playing.. :)

[darthhento]

KNOW IT!
NO NOOBS!
HAVE EARS!
LISTEN!
BE RESPONSIVE!

add Elite BB, BYOH and you have my usual LFM.

And yes, devs, PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IT HOLY, give us the ability to withdraw our request to join.

[Cogdoc]

hehe... +1 as well. your cup runneth over. :)

they feed their inner-child and wear their bigboy hat.

KNOW IT!
NO NOOBS!
HAVE EARS!
LISTEN!
BE RESPONSIVE!


...toobs.

If its my inner child already... what boobs? and yeah I have ears, they are around my head somewhere.

[goodspeed]

No you must stay there never knowing if an accept is remotely around the corner!

lol I remember I hit some box but I didn't even remember hitting it. 15 minutes or so passes and i'm watching something with the game minimized. And while i'm watching I keep healing these faint voices. Come to find it's a raid lol.

[AzB]

Agreed on the withdraw for lfm

If I don't get accepted in first 1-2 minutes, I am off to the next squirrel, and sometimes, thats just plain old slayers or solo quest, and then suddenly, ten minutes later... you have joined group. Hmmm, what to do now? Cause I ain't leaving what I am doing

Grab a hire. They'll get the "xxxx is already in a group" message. And you can leave hire parked at entrance or dismiis them after that if you don't need them.

[bartharok]

When i click a lfm, and dont get accepted for some time i find something else to do. Nobody has been upset by this so far. When ive been declined, ive never sent any rude tells, but have been sent some apologies with reasons why (good ones usually). On the whole i find pugs nice, but i do know that some rotten apples can find their way into any barrel. Just remember that you dont have to toss the whole barrel away, just remove the rotten ones. (My "friend" list is good for that)

[Masterspud]

Hey now, I'm on Cannith and I'm mellow as heck. :)

I HAVE run into a couple fairly high-strung types though, so hm. My favorite one was when I was toodling around on my cleric at one point and looking to do some eveningstar epics, and saw a group forming to do them. So I clicked on join, got almost IMMEDIATELY declined, and the guy sent me a really nasty tell accusing me of having "joined and immediately left" earlier, and that he "didn't need some ****ing noob screwing up his groups".

Considering I'd only logged on like 5m before that, I sent him a rather puzzled tell asking what the hell he was smoking. He threw a couple more insults at me, so I told him he'd OBVIOUSLY mistaken me for someone with a similar name (not sure how, as Aliandyra is a pretty unique name, I think!), but to have a nice day anyway. I might have added "moron" or something afterwards, can't be sure. ;)


I know exactly which tool you are speaking of....

[HPL]

If I hit your LFM and you don't want me to join for whatever reason, feel free to hit decline. I promise I won't be offended or blacklist you or scribble your name furiously into a notebook of people I will never group with again. I'll just move on - no big deal. A response ("accept" OR "decline") is just common courtesy.


If you are going AFK for an extended period of time, kindly pass the star so someone else can accept people.


If you wait twenty minutes, try to accept me, and find out I'm already in a group, please refrain from sending me nasty tells claiming I'm wasting your time by hitting your group when I'm already in a group.

Thank you.

:-)

/signed

[Masterspud]

my favorite is still...
No first timers, know the quest, TRs only, need guide

^^^^^^
I see at least one of these a day and its a real humor for me, I normally ignore them, but often its the same toon that puts these lfm's up on Cannith so the other day I joined it just long enough to type into chat, "Plz share and whats a TR" and watched the chat explode and left.

I got a pretty good laugh out of that.

[danzig138]

Trust me when I say I mean this in a sincere way, but why waste your time posting about someone that obviously has at least one personality disorder and/or mental illness?
Good question. Almost as good as why waste your time posting about someone wasting their time posting?

[Kawai]

good question. Almost as good as why waste your time posting about someone wasting their time posting?

:)

[Arius]

Good question. Almost as good as why waste your time posting about someone wasting their time posting?

Seemingly clever, but all too predictable.

It's a bigger picture thing that you obviously don't see. My post had a premise where as yours lacks one entirely - not to mention that it actually contributed to the original topic.

[Sinsyne]

Decline is a straightforward no, waiting for an accept to timeout (sort of) or inquiring about DC or HP or whatever is just rude. (The latter is noobish too.)

[Viisari]

This is so annoying that I've been thinking I should start blacklisting people who don't know where the decline button is...