Favorite Dungeon Master Text

[ddobard1]

I would like to know your favorite Dungeon Master text. My favorite is:

...but he is no hobgoblin! (Tangleroot Gorge Quest)

[dv8maker123]

As stated in the DM thread, "Somebody, Anybody, please, help"...Cry for Help....

[Nonan]

"It doesn't take a Kalashtar......"

From Greymoon

[Shamurai]

Well there is that one part in Redwillow .... regarding um "something" being "cleansed" that always make me snicker.

[r3dl4nce]

"Welcome traveller, you will learn to call this place home"
Tomb of Wizard King

[Murgatroyd]

There's a Fire Reaver in the library! --Coyle

[Feylina]

The lighthouse: Recovering the lost tome

(Dungeon Master): The librarian cheerfully agrees to show you his collection. He leads you below the tower, then motions you closer to speak.

this always sounds dirty to me for some reason. in a creepy old man kinda way. mebe like the old dude off family guy.

[calvinklien]

--

[Draccus]

"The tactician looks up from his troop roster. You're not on it though, so he snarls and wades into battle." - Tangleroot

"I was beginning to think we wouldn't get to play." - Shadow Crypt

"What is this? I should be on Shavarath!" - DDO players for the 8 months before DDO:EU ;)

[Atenhotep]

"We beat them off ... this time." - after saving the guy from the Sauhagin (sp?)

(Please dont ask me to remember the name of that Korthos Island Quest but when it comes to sounding dirty .. )

[Syrbryce]

"or Kill him!"

Coalescense Chamber

[Cedwin]

"or Kill him!"

Coalescense Chamber

It cracks me up in the Coal Chamber when he talks in that nasaly voice.

[Bekki]

"With the loses of the Mindsunders power
the Dragon reasserts his will... And looks very annoyed." ~ Misery's Peak

and another favorite...

You cannot have a DM Text thread without it so...

"You must not leave until you FREE ARLOS!" ~ Waterworks

:D

[Shamurai]

It cracks me up in the Coal Chamber when he talks in that nasaly voice.


Yeah and how he knows we won't "talk to him" so just do 'it your way" - Kill him.

[Bekki]

"or Kill him!"

Coalescense Chamber

"Oh you not going to listen to me anyway.... so... just do what you want..."
later on in the Coalescence Chamber... ;)

[StrikerDroid]

"I'll kill you, KILL YOU ALL!! And then he dies, effectively calling his own bluff." YarYar and the DM from Irestone Inlet.

You know we need a new quest that YarYar comes back as some form of undead just to take revenge for the Inlet.

[binnsr]

"You must not leave until you FREE ARLOS!" ~ Waterworks

:D
best quote in the game ..
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h311/eldamir/DDO/arlos/arlos_1.jpg
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h311/eldamir/DDO/arlos/arlos_2.jpg
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h311/eldamir/DDO/arlos/arlos_3.jpg
http://i67.photobucket.com/albums/h311/eldamir/DDO/arlos/arlos_4.jpg

(didn't have enough letters (or the inclination :))to make 'and gather your party members at the exit!'):cool:

[Memnir]

It's not really DM text - but I love talking to the random Kobolds in STK Pt II.

"Me magic you in face!"


Just makes me smile each and every time. :D

[xTethx]

There's a Fire Reaver in the library! --Coyle

Whenever I hear this I think of Mirta zerging east 2 :)

[Murgatroyd]

but I love talking to the random Kobolds in STK Pt II.

"Me magic you in face!"


Well if you're going to bring up that, in STK as well "Hobgob food is Kobold! Kobold!"

[Bekki]

It's not really DM text - but I love talking to the random Kobolds in STK Pt II.

"Me magic you in face!"


Just makes me smile each and every time. :D

Awesome.

That's like the Kobolds in Waterworks...

"You no Gnashtooth, you die now!"

[Rydlic]

I always love the DM's Soft Female Voice,
"The chamber will close in 10 seconds"

[Rickpa]

Not so much for the words themselves, but they way they are delivered... the hellhound den on Sorrowdusk Island. How does that go again? "Singed fur. Gnawed bones. The stench of smoke. This is a den of hell hounds!"

[Quikster]

"Make Haste!!!!"

[gorloch]

As stated in the DM thread, "Somebody, Anybody, please, help"...Cry for Help....

I have to say this has got to be one of my favorites. Not so much for the words but the voice behind it. Another favorite is running Delera's with my guild leader and listening to him repeat the DM text there. He sounds just like Gary Gygax.


PIXA

[Stanley_Nicholas]

These are not DM texts, but things said by monsters, mostly in ADQ. I think whoever wrote the Pyrodemon's dialog had been watching Silence of the Lambs and Army of Darkness the night before. ;)

(Say): Pyrodemon says, ''I will drape myself in your flesh!''

(Say): Pyrodemon says, ''My kin will swallow your soul!''

(Say): Drow Scorpion says, ''Your head shall make an ugly trophy.''

(Say): Wildman Thrall says, ''I knew I smelled the blood of a runt!''

(Say): Adur-Nac says, ''Prepare to feast on pain and agony.''

[ddaedelus]

Awesome.

That's like the Kobolds in Waterworks...

"You no Gnashtooth, you die now!"

"Kobolds never forget! Kobolds always hate you!"

[Gnorbert]

"We beat them off ... this time." - after saving the guy from the Sauhagin (sp?)

(Please dont ask me to remember the name of that Korthos Island Quest but when it comes to sounding dirty .. )

I was going to post the same one. Makes me giggle every time. :D

[DoctorWhofan]

"You Laugh at Har-HAr!?!"

THe rare kolbold in Water Works slayers

[Sheherazade]

and these automatons later...(overdramatic pause) became the WAAAARFOOOOORRGGGEEED.

Korthos island...but my favorite line is still "Oh no the Suahagin have found me" <- had that once in a party and someone spammed that NPC all the time X_X somehow we couldnt stop laughing

[Maxwell1380]

Don't remember which quest but: "You beat them off.....this time"

Madstone: "Almost there.....just a little longer" reminds me of something my wife said once......

[Letrii]

"We beat them off ... this time." - after saving the guy from the Sauhagin (sp?)

(Please dont ask me to remember the name of that Korthos Island Quest but when it comes to sounding dirty .. )

Redemption

I like the Crazy Kobold rare in Atraxia's Haven.

[hermespan]

"We beat them off ... this time." - after saving the guy from the Sauhagin (sp?)

(Please dont ask me to remember the name of that Korthos Island Quest but when it comes to sounding dirty .. )

this one made me snicker

[Darkrok]

"Kobolds never forget! Kobolds always hate you!"

Best line in the game by far! My favorite is when you kill the things so fast that the quote comes up after they've been laying on the ground a few seconds and you've already run down the hallway to the next fight. :)


Personally I would like to hear people like Sean Connery do a few dungeons..

"I should have given the book to the Marx brothers"




or, and this would be hilarious, Christopher Walken.

You walk in..<pause>...to the dungeon, you know.
its hot..<pause> ....and scary.
Your bones....... kinda quiver with anticipation.....you know

I would shell out double the normal price for a Christopher Walken-dm'd module! Maybe a quest where someone is sick and dying of a fever. They need you to steal a magical bell from a minotaur shaman to save their life. "And as the dying man sends you on your way, he grips your arm frantically and says..."

[captain1z]

"You see a note on the floor, near a mangled body there"


and also


"Thier taint has been cleansed............" O.o

[Daerius of the Blessed Blades]

I don't remember the EXACT phrase, but I always loved the phrase when reaching the Hobgoblin village in STK, pt II:

'The hobgoblin village looks a lot like a human village... except for all the skulls"

And it's not DM text, but I love when the elves in Gwylan's scream "Stop Sticking Me!"

[ssarasin]

Not DM text, but I always am amused by the Kobolds in the shipment quest...

Something along the lines of "Yark Yark! Me hate big box!"

[weyoun]

Crucible

You tell Jorgundal: "Tell your lackeys <Character name> has come for them."

Its fun when the character name is absurd. Like when my Beanskin says it.

Tell your lackeys Beanskin has come for them.

[Dandonk]

Shipment:
"You're the fool Devil! Now witness the power of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL Titan!"

[captain1z]

Shipment:
"You're the fool Devil! Now witness the power of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL Titan!"



ummm star wars much? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxMd93aCvd0

[krud]

There's text???

...share plz.

[Dandonk]

ummm star wars much? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wxMd93aCvd0

Yes, I think the devs might have watched it a time or two since they made the NPC say that. Maybe three times, even.

[ddobard1]

This one is very good too:
"All about you, you see the telltale signs of kobolds moving through the sewers" (Missing In Action)

[athousandbees]

"Keep HITTING those CRATES!"

[Talon_Moonshadow]

"Who disturbs my tomb dog, you will never leave this place alive."

And I always want to point to another player when I hear that. :D



Also, not DM text, but I really like the dialog in the new market quest where you rescue the family.

So there I was a lvl 16 killing machine, and I walked up to the first famliy member and said: "Come with me if you want to live."
Thought that was cool.

[Talon_Moonshadow]

I always love the DM's Soft Female Voice,
"The chamber will close in 10 seconds"

lol.
Yeah, they seem to think a good D&D experiance is having a male DM do bad accents and female voices. lol.

[Talon_Moonshadow]

These are not DM texts, but things said by monsters, mostly in ADQ. I think whoever wrote the Pyrodemon's dialog had been watching Silence of the Lambs and Army of Darkness the night before. ;)

(Say): Pyrodemon says, ''I will drape myself in your flesh!''

(Say): Pyrodemon says, ''My kin will swallow your soul!''

(Say): Drow Scorpion says, ''Your head shall make an ugly trophy.''

(Say): Wildman Thrall says, ''I knew I smelled the blood of a runt!''

(Say): Adur-Nac says, ''Prepare to feast on pain and agony.''

I also like: "bow down and sacrifice yourself to the devourer."
And I always say, "Bow down and sacrifice yourself to me!" and then kill him. :) And the first time, I had a cleric who commanded him to do just that.

[evilnatas]

Well there is that one part in Redwillow .... regarding um "something" being "cleansed" that always make me snicker.

this has got to be my all time favorite. everybody can appreciates a freshly cleansed taint.

[DoctorWhofan]

What's the cry that the Kobolds Digazfoo or something?

[IgorUnchained]

"It doesn't take a Kalashtar......"

From Greymoon

That is my favorite also.

I have to admit though...the Cleansing of the taint, the foul miasma, and the rest of the colorful descriptions are great also.

[Frodo_Lives]

Maybe the spiders didn't kill these people, maybe it was ................... SOMETHING ELSE!

Way to be over dramatic in the catacombs quest DM!

[Cedwin]

What's the cry that the Kobolds Digazfoo or something?

Dizafrabadoooo! :D

I don't believe you heard me stutter.... when I mentioned peanut butter.

[rest]

A gelatanious cube? There's no use asking it ANYTHING! Kill it quick before it engulfs you!

The only DM audio I ever listen to. It's a runing joke in guild. My guild leader does a great imitation of this one, and it makes me laugh every single time.



Also, the line in Pt. 5 of the shroud. I don't know exactly what he says, but I know it ends with "Trickery!" and I always always always put "TRICKERY!" into the guild user chanel. It's like a guild trademark for me. Much like only getting on mic when I'm drunk :p

[binnsr]

The only DM audio I ever listen to. It's a runing joke in guild. My guild leader does a great imitation of this one, and it makes me laugh every single time.

That's kind of like the completely flat ones in Threnal East 2 from Coyle -- most particularly: "That's done it. Doors open"

That one was a running joke in guild for a long time. Anytime someone had to open a door, someone would lay that one over VC..

[Rhysem]

"This module is narrated by <someone other than the standard narrator>"

Seriously. This guy is Shamin* voice actors everywhere. It is a Trail* to listen to him screw things up.

*: Shaman
*: Trial

[Kalari]

In the one mindsunder quest where you rescue the mayor's son. There is a little halfling who I adore that you free (or think you do)

"I do not think that you heard me stutter when I said PEANUT BUTTER!" he seems to have a fixation with the stuff even yells it as his battle cry :) Love that text its too funny.

[Bogenbroom]

Out on Sorrowdusk, up past the first shrine in the troll camp... ~"The trolls here seem intent on keeping you out of their sacred place."

Always makes me giggle like a 12 year old...

[Skye]

Bump 'cause I'm bored:D

[MithrilSoul]

Maybe the spiders didn't kill these people, maybe it was ................... SOMETHING ELSE!

Way to be over dramatic in the catacombs quest DM!

Haha I like this one too. Especially considering we're in a tomb full of UNDEAD. (Yeah, ya think?)

[markledave]

I like the one in a Korthos quest "The devourer won't get to feast tonight, not on your watch" or something close to that. I seem to always repeat it in a death metal voice when it comes up. \m/

[Bobthesponge]

Don't remember which quest but: "You beat them off.....this time"

Madstone: "Almost there.....just a little longer" reminds me of something my wife said once......

just once? ;-)

[Ganolyn]

This isn't DM text, but the best one I've seen so far was when a Kobold yelled "Oww! My Spleen!"

[Horrorscope]

I'm hoping in the underwater quest forthcoming we get.... "We need a bigger boat!".

[sirgog]

Not DM text again, but the Baudry 1 kobolds.

"Me hates big boxes!"

[k0ukla]

The lighthouse: Recovering the lost tome

(Dungeon Master): The librarian cheerfully agrees to show you his collection. He leads you below the tower, then motions you closer to speak.

this always sounds dirty to me for some reason. in a creepy old man kinda way. mebe like the old dude off family guy.

ohh u dont like herbert the pervert? lol

[Bago]

Maybe Jeets will be slightly less greedy .. maybe.

[devaneto]

..... "I'm sorry but this selection is incore-e-e-e-e-e-e-e-ct!"
:-D

[amanda_t]

That one Korthos quest... where you have to talk to the guy against the sahaugin-

"OH NO! THE SAHAUGIN HAVE FOUND ME!" and you click him over and over and he keeps saying it :D

[omastar444]

I'm shocked no one said my favorite from Delirium:
"You don't like how that kitchen key is looking at you. Maybe you should teach it a lesson!"

[penumbra]

"I'll kill you, KILL YOU ALL!! And then he dies, effectively calling his own bluff." YarYar and the DM from Irestone Inlet.

You know we need a new quest that YarYar comes back as some form of undead just to take revenge for the Inlet.

irestone inlet is one of my favorite quests just for the DM.

[phillymiket]

My favorite unfinished work

"And where there's one trog..."

What, what happens where there's one trog?!?

[FuzzyDuck81]

Shipment:
"You're the fool Devil! Now witness the power of this fully ARMED and OPERATIONAL Titan!"

"er... where did the mortals get THAT?" (or something to that effect) :)

i also liked the dreaming dark dialogue when you face the shadow council:

"wait, i recognise this mortal.. is that.. X?"
"the same X that defeated sor'jek.. twice?"
the same X that defeated lailat in her own palace"
etc.
"i must go inform the dream stealer at once" (iirc thats his name? might be wrong, not woken up yet)
"we must go too!" *half of them disappear*

:) just cracked me up the 1st time i saw it

[tarkin1980]

Delera has ben re-LEASED!!!!!!!!!!!11!111!111!111oneoneeleven

Most of his quotes are hilarious though (near a mangled body there!). May he rest in peace.

Special mention goes to "OH NO! The sahuagin found mehhh!"

[acidtiger]

I forget the name of the Hobgoblin, but he is in Gywlen's, who 'commands his unit to form up.'. That one always makes the bf and I chuckle. :)

[Isolani]

Not DM text, but I always laugh when I get the Reclamation quest from the druid in Ataraxia, your response to accept the quest "Gems? Gold? Your story moves me druid."

[AnubisPrime]

Mine is: "The strong smell of sewage permeates the air around you."

They actually changed the narrator for that one.

and: "...This is Wind-l-a-s-h-e-r Terrrrri Toreeee!"

I can swear in Tangleroot the narrator said "TangleFOOT" at one point...

[Hendrik]

Monkey Socket.

[calavel]

Reclamation - while walking through a random corridor with no encounter -

"The deadly water spider Deluge SPRINGS - AND ATTACKS!!!"

... no it doesn't.

[Hambo]

There are a lot of gag names and tributes in this game...

"Private Jake" in WaterWorks

The tip that misquotes Bruce Campbell from Army of Darkness:
"Good, Bad, I'm the guy with the +5 repeating crossbow" (or similar)

The Spellsinger in the second room of the second Sharn Syndicate quest, as you kill him:
"Right! I'll do you for that!"

I'm not sure, but I may have seen a "It's only a flesh wound..." somewhere in the mix, but don't quote me on it :D

[Grond]

No fight, no food!

[Neko-kun]

Kobold Shaman in Stormcleave:
"Dizfrabadoo!"

We are one step closer to learning how to speak kobold :D

[Daliyn]

and these automatons later...(overdramatic pause) became the WAAAARFOOOOORRGGGEEED.

Yay, redemption. Love it, it truely draws me into the story every time I hear it.

[Salsa]

Entry quest...

'You pick up the silver key...'


except it's an iron key....

[Aristalla]

I'm shocked no one said my favorite from Delirium:
"You don't like how that kitchen key is looking at you. Maybe you should teach it a lesson!"

This is one of my favorites as well. The first time I did it, I probably ran around that room for 5 minutes trying to find a way around killing the key as I didn't want to destroy it. Hehe, being a newb is fun.

[woundead85]

Monkey Socket.

BWAHAHAHAHAHA!!! Thought it was just me perverted ;)
No more rep for you, must spread.

[Farayon]

Haven't seen much of this awesome game yet, but I love every single instance of the "standard" DM voice saying the word 'room' and whenever he impersonates someone or something else.


from irestonle inlet:

(Dungeon Master): Hobble the hobgoblin stands with weapons drawn and a foul expression on his face.

(Dungeon Master): Hobble the hobgoblin has been hacked apart!


from VoN 1:

(Dungeon Master): Kegs of potent liquor have been attached to these battering rams for easy transport. It's a marvel of hobgoblin ingenuity!

[DoctorWhofan]

I miss the "Tanglefoot" referance.

[ExarKun77]

My favorite, in tempest spine: "Lair of fire and ice".
For a bad reason, though, because the emphasis and the tone just make smile each time i do this raid.

[AphexTwin]

[QUOTE=captain1z;2670430]"You see a note on the floor, near a mangled body there"

First time I heard Gary Gygax read this I almost died laughing.

[Antheal]

"... it quivers as you approach, perhaps in anticipation."

Rocky Horror Picture Show reference FTW! :D